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Teamwork in Marriage: Ditch the Scorekeeping Habit
Scorekeeping never wins in marriage. Why? Because no one wants to sleep with a Loser. Ditch the scorekeeping habit and you both score a win. Teamwork takes the gold.
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Candid Chris
Michelle: When I was teaching third grade, one of the assignments I gave my students was to create and write about their own superhero. One of my students, wrote about Buttered Toast Man. A three-pager about a guy whose job it was to save the world from dry toast. What my students didn’t know is that I live with my very own superhero, my husband, Candid Chris. His superpower: tell people hard-hitting truths that they might not want to hear and probably want to acknowledge even less. If I were writing his superhero story, I would include the time that Candid Chris said to our neighbor, “Sure your new car is great, but it…
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What is the Secret to a Happy Marriage?
Most people don’t start out in marriage thinking “This could be fun for a while, but once it’s not I’ll move on.” When you get married it’s exciting and romantic and fun and interesting. But no marriage is free from challenges and disagreements. There is no magic finish line where there are no challenges in our marriage. The temptation to think such a place exists is one of the biggest dangers of all, because it sets you up for failure.
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Peeling the Onion of Intimacy in Marriage
Do you feel disconnected or lonely in your marriage? Let’s talk about Peeling the Onion of Emotional Intimacy.
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Start Intentional Gifting and Celebrate Your Valentine All Year
Valentine’s Day is second only to Christmas for gift buying. Cards say what we can’t put into words. A fancy dinner is treasured time, but flowers fade and chocolate quickly disappears. What if you could spend less and give more by offering a gift of love nearly every day? You can with Intentional Gifting.
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Heart Cards
Chris: With Valentine’s Day quickly approaching, we were inspired to share how our daughter’s holiday assignment led to a new take on a traditional symbol. When our daughter was in the second grade, the teacher challenged the class to make their own Valentine’s cards. As she got in the car from school, she told me about her assignment. Her concern: “I don’t love everyone in my class. I don’t want to put a heart on every card.” My suggestion: “When we get home, look up what a human heart really looks like.” When Michelle arrived home that evening, Taryn had 14 Valentine’s cards with a typical heart shape on them AND 9 cards…
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Our “One of a Kind” Marriage
Our marriage is one of a kind. While we’re two people who have come from different places, we put together our past and present influences to become something new. Looking Inside My Family of Origin Jen: Family of origin has had a strong influence on our marriage. My parents stayed married throughout my childhood. I saw elements of disharmony, but since my parents were still together, I brushed off any worry. When I was in college, my parents divorced. The disharmony had gotten worse over time, and I figured this must be the natural progression of marriage. I met Nick not long after my parents split, and we got serious…
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Little Things
JULIE “Little Things Mean a Lot” was one of my mom’s favorite songs. It starts off like this: “Blow me a kiss from across the roomSay I look nice when I’m notTouch my hair as you pass my chairLittle things mean a lot” These timeless lyrics are spot on – little things DO mean a lot. I do many little things for John throughout the day. I can make John’s coffee. I can scratch his head. I can make his favorite meal for dinner. I can put my phone down and listen when he tells me about his day. All of these are little things that when done with great…
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4 Steps to Resolve Disagreements in Marriage
This week we decided to share something we clipped out of a newspaper a few years ago with the title: How to Resolve Disagreements in Marriage, by Nina Chen, Ph.D. A quick google search led us to the online version here: http://missourifamilies.org/features/divorcearticles/divorcefeature45.htm Here’s what Dr. Chen, a Human Development Specialist with the University of Missouri Extension, has to say: “There is no perfect marriage. Even happy, healthy marriages involve some conflict from time to time. Conflict is a normal part of sharing life with someone else. The key is to know how to deal with disagreement and conflict in a constructive way. These steps can help: 1. Set a specific…
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Cultivating Happiness
morning sunrise with highway foreground