The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • Communication

    Finding Peace

    August 30, 2026 / No Comments

    Working our way through an unusually busy week last week, we finally reached an evening where we managed a little date out together to regroup. When we are having chaotic or taxing times, it’s always good to seek out a little bit of peace.

    Read More
    Nick and Jen

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    Stale Crackers

    November 2, 2020

    Scorekeeping in Marriage

    December 8, 2019

    Slamming Cupboard Doors

    August 28, 2018
  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Growth

    We Are In Our Netflix Era

    July 27, 2026 / 3 Comments

    Chris♥️Michelle: Recently, we were talking to some friends about staying relevant in today’s world. They made the comparison of Blockbuster and Netflix. Blockbuster was great, back in the day, but where are they now? We imagine that their late fees, out-of-stock favorites and resistance to change is why they’re no longer around. Compare this to Netflix. When they started, they were a mail order DVD rental company. Now, they are an always evolving web-based giant! We thought about a similar comparison with our marriage. Shift from Transaction to Subscription • Blockbuster Way: every interaction was a transaction and if you’re late, there’s a penalty. I do this when I say…

    Read More
    Chris and Michelle

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    Loving Each Other in Spite of Our Differences

    Loving Each Other in Spite of Our Differences

    April 4, 2022

    Control in This Thing Called Life

    June 24, 2024

    My Tip Troll

    May 30, 2022
  • Couple on sofa discussing love languages
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Growth,  Happiness

    What’s Your Spouse’s Love Language? 

    June 22, 2026 / No Comments

    Is The 5 Love Languages outdated? Not a chance. See how this practical tool is still saving, changing, and boosting marriages today—plus, resources to find your own language.

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    3 Life Lessons From the Movie ‘Wicked’

    December 9, 2024
    a good time and a good story

    A Good Time AND a Good Story

    August 17, 2026

    Married Singles

    August 21, 2023
  • live your best life
    Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Finances,  Listening

    The BEST of Your Life

    May 4, 2026 / No Comments

    John:  “Today is the first day of the BEST of your life.”  I retired last Friday after 41 years of working in the IT field.  That quote was on the card I received from the team I led.  While it is certainly appropriate for retirement, it also rings true in our everyday life.  Every day, we can choose to live our best life, regardless of the changes, circumstances, and chaos around us. 

    Read More
    John and Julie

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    8 Ideas to Help Settle Disagreements in Marriage

    October 19, 2020

    5 Things Men Want

    March 1, 2021
    angry couple

    Making Up is Hard to Do

    August 28, 2022
  • Common marriage mistakes
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Resilience

    Top 10 Tips to Ruin Your Marriage 

    March 23, 2026 / 1 Comment

    1. Put the Relationship on Autopilot  Stop dating your spouse. Stop pursuing. You’ve won them, haven’t you? Transition into roommate mode. Cultivate separate lives, separate friends even separate interests. The marriage will take care of itself, the way houseplants do when you don’t water them. 😜 2. Stop Saying Thank You – It’s Overrated.    Gratitude is for new relationships and people who are still trying to impress each other. Your spouse should know they’re appreciated. Stop saying thank you for dinner and other small things… it takes too much energy. 😫 3. Keep Score  Marriage can be a competitive sport (with no trophy). Keep a mental spreadsheet of every chore, forgotten anniversary, and argument. Have this info at hand during arguments to ensure you always have the upper hand.  4. Outsource Intimacy  …

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    Ken and Janine

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    Removing the Invisibility Cloak

    October 23, 2023
    To DO list with Take Time-out for US! Checked off

    Time-out!

    January 19, 2026

    Marriage Wake-Up Calls

    August 7, 2023
  • marriage requires commitment like the olympics
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Growth,  Happiness,  Perseverance,  Resilience

    Marriage – the Olympics of Relationships

    February 23, 2026 / 2 Comments

    Julie: John and I have really enjoyed watching the Olympics these past couple of weeks. Medals are won by fractions of a second. Partnerships are tested under pressure. Expectations run high. There is disappointment and elation. Marriage is the Olympics of Relationships. Both require preparation, endurance, resilience, and an unwavering commitment to something bigger than yourself.

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    John and Julie

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    Sacrificing vs. Generosity in Marriage: A Paradigm Shift

    June 14, 2026
    Common marriage mistakes

    Top 10 Tips to Ruin Your Marriage 

    March 23, 2026

    The Kindness Challenge

    January 4, 2026
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Making Decisions,  Stress,  Time

    Ready for a Marriage Check-up?

    February 16, 2026 / No Comments

    If someone asks, “How’s your marriage?” how would you answer? It’s hard to give an objective answer. This week, we offer a short quiz you can take to evaluate how things are going in your marriage. Before we can move toward the goal of a better marriage, we need to know where we are currently.  Doing this Marriage Check-up exercise helped us take stock of how we were doing. Here’s what we learned…  We had a couple areas where Ken’s scores were higher than Janine’s (or vice-versa) – Parenting and Spirituality. We agreed the area where we struggle the most as a couple was Conflict Resolution. This all led to some…

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    Intentional Marriage — 50 Ways

    October 14, 2019

    Candid Chris

    March 7, 2022

    Anger, Over the Top

    July 15, 2019
  • To DO list with Take Time-out for US! Checked off
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Decision to Love,  Intimacy,  Making Decisions,  Time

    Time-out!

    January 19, 2026 / No Comments

    Julie:  Let’s be honest—life gets busy. Between work, kids, errands, and the never-ending to-do list, it’s so easy for your marriage to slip down your list of priorities. You’re not alone if you’ve ever looked at your spouse at the end of a long day and realized you haven’t really connected, maybe not even had a real conversation, in days or even weeks. But here’s the thing – taking a time-out for your marriage isn’t just something that’s nice to do. It’s the foundation that keeps everything else in your life running smoothly.

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    John and Julie

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    Smiling is a Superpower

    February 28, 2023

    $#*! My Spouse Says

    September 19, 2023
    marriage requires commitment like the olympics

    Marriage – the Olympics of Relationships

    February 23, 2026
  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences

    Opposites Attract

    December 15, 2025 / 1 Comment

    Michelle: I love watching Dancing with the Stars. Chris: I love watching Ghost Hunters and I hate that I know the pros, past and present, who have been on Dancing with the Stars. Michelle: One of the pros, Mark Ballas, sings with his wife when he is not performing or rehearsing for a Tuesday night show. Chris: One afternoon, Michelle sent me the song, Highs and Lows, by Alexander Jean (the band formed by Mark Ballas and his wife Brittney Jean). Michelle sent it with a text that read, “This is so us.” Michelle: I remember as a child, hearing that opposites attract and being confused by the concept. My…

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    Chris and Michelle

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    4 Ways to Keep the Sexual Pilot Light Lit

    March 21, 2022
    A clean slate

    A Clean Slate

    January 2, 2023

    Candid Chris

    March 7, 2022
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Making Decisions,  Stress

    Decisions, Decisions

    November 17, 2025 / No Comments

    Learn a simplified decision-making process for married couples. When facing hard choices, remember that "we" come first. This article outlines how to pause, zoom out, and make important decisions together for a stronger marriage.

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    Dear Younger Us

    May 17, 2021

    Tidying Up Your Marriage KonMari Style

    June 10, 2019

    3 Tips to Make Your Marriage Thrive

    August 20, 2019
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  • Finding Peace
  • In Sickness and In Health – Part 2
  • A Good Time AND a Good Story
  • Earning a Time Out
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