-
Why Sex Matters in Marriage
For many married couples, physical intimacy gradually decreases over time. Busy schedules, stress, or feelings of guilt or embarrassment can all contribute to a decline in this vital part of a healthy marriage. But what if we told you that prioritizing physical touch isn’t just about pleasure, but about strengthening your marriage and revitalizing your love? Sex matters in marriage. What’s the Big Deal? Janine: For a LONG time, I really didn’t understand how significant and important physical intimacy is. Making love was the last thing on my list of priorities, and I just didn’t understand why it seemed so important to Ken. When you were growing up, did you get the message that sex was…
-
Gift Giving: Buck the Status Quo
Gift giving can be a challenge. It can evoke a sense of duty and meets a societal norm. Both carry a lot of pressure. This post gives ideas on creativity and ways to ‘Buck the status quo.’ It reminds us that the circle of love in gift giving is completed only when gifts are received with gratitude.
-
What is Love Asking of Me Now?
Michelle: Several years ago, a friend of mine shared that during a crashing disappointment in her relationship, her therapist suggested that she ask herself, “What is love asking of me now?” My friend shared that despite her instinct to move away from heartache, love was asking her to stretch in a way that she never had before. With several challenges in our lives, Chris and I have found ourselves asking this very question, “What is love asking of me now?” When I received a phone call from a friend of mine, sharing that her daughter died by suicide, I found myself wanting to allow the cloud of gray to recolor…
-
Opposites Attract?
You have likely heard the saying, “opposites attract.” While this is not always true, for many couples it is true. And when it is true, we have discovered that we can draw on our differences to make us a stronger couple.
-
When In Doubt, Just Get Naked
When we were newlyweds, we heard another couple (married much longer than us) quip a line of advice: “when in doubt, just get naked.” It sounded good to us at the time, and it has only become more relevant since then. Let us explain…
-
Total Eclipse of the Heart
Julie Did you see the Great American Eclipse? If you were able to experience this rare cosmic phenomenon, you were lucky indeed. It was truly beyond description and way cooler than we’d ever imagined (literally as well – the temp dropped about 20 degrees during totality). A day later, Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” is still running around in my head…and I don’t mind. But what I do mind is that I had a total eclipse of the heart in how I behaved towards John that day.
-
Love & Respect
Making generalized statements about men or women can be risky. But there’s one generalization that seems to apply to most of us. A few years ago, we went to a marriage enrichment on the topic of Love & Respect. It was based on a book by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (“Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs”), a New York Times best seller. The premise of this book is that men (in general) need to be respected, while women (in general) need to feel loved. Disagreeing Respectfully JANINE: Eggerichs points out that when a husband feels disrespected, it could just as well be translated as…
-
It Don’t Come Easy
“It don’t come easy” has been an ear-worm for us this year. It has become a positive force for reflection in our lives and journey. Sometimes it is the curve balls from left field that awaken us to the beauty that has been given to us. We only need to reframe the picture.
-
In Sickness and in Health… Even During Cold and Flu Season
On our wedding day, we looked deeply into each other’s eyes and promised, among other things, to be true to each other in sickness and in health… all the days of our lives. While the two of us take that vow seriously, we have discovered over the years that it is not always easy. Especially during cold and flu season. Suffice it to say we do not suffer minor illnesses in the same way. Suck It Up Karen: Perhaps you have heard the joke that the closest a woman will ever come to knowing what it is like for a man suffering from a common cold is when she is…
-
Just Go To Bed
Chris: As much as we both dislike conflict, we seem to have an uncanny ability to have disagreements at the most inopportune times. Take, for example, the angry conversation we began about money, moments before our friends came over. Or the heated discussion we had about being late to things, that I started because we were driving to church, LATE! And, of course, there have been countless times that we have argued well into the wee hours of the morning, when all we really wanted to do was go to bed. Michelle: At our wedding shower, people wrote cards to me with their sage marriage advice. Card after card offered, “Never go to bed…
