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Just Go To Bed
Chris: As much as we both dislike conflict, we seem to have an uncanny ability to have disagreements at the most inopportune times. Take, for example, the angry conversation we began about money, moments before our friends came over. Or the heated discussion we had about being late to things, that I started because we were driving to church, LATE! And, of course, there have been countless times that we have argued well into the wee hours of the morning, when all we really wanted to do was go to bed. Michelle: At our wedding shower, people wrote cards to me with their sage marriage advice. Card after card offered, “Never go to bed…
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We Get By With a Little Help From Our Friends
Michelle: When Chris and I met, I had my friends and he had his friends. After we got married, some of my friends became our friends as did some of his. Now, in our more than twenty years together, we have made new friends, most of which we refer to as our friends. Some of our friends have been initiated by him and some have been initiated by me, however, recently, we were hanging out with one of OUR friends. These are friends we met at the same time and just instantly clicked. Chris: We were walking to dinner together, myself by the husband and Michelle standing behind us with…
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Our Anti-Resolution List
This post originally appeared on The Couples Post in Jan. 2022. We decided to re-post it this week as it offers some great ideas to ponder. Everyone at The Couples Post would like to wish our readers a Happy and Healthy 2024. Every New Year, articles pop up about making resolutions. This year, we have taken some common resolutions and would like to propose our own list. We are calling it Our Anti-Resolutions List 5. New vs. Old One of the most popular resolutions is to travel to NEW places. While we are a big supporter of seeking new adventures, in our anti-resolutions list, we offer, rediscovering the OLD places you have traveled to. Who cares that…
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5 Bite Sized Ways to Become Better
Chris: Human beings are the only species on the planet who believe that we can be better today than we were yesterday. Still, many of us struggle to actually be better. Here are five ways to begin. One: Let Go Of Pre-existing Ideas that Do Not Make Sense to You. My mother-in-law once said that she couldn’t eat pizza unless she had a knife and fork to cut it with. I asked, “Have you ever just picked up a slice and ate it?” She looked disgusted. But, when the pizza came to the table, there were no knives. As we waited for her knife, I said, “Are we really going to waste a perfectly good pizza?” She…
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Removing the Invisibility Cloak
Chris: When we first moved to Arizona from Oklahoma, I went from an on-site job, to working from home. My being home meant that my “honey-do” list grew, because my wife thought my lack of travel to an office could afford me plenty of time to complete all kinds of projects. Michelle: After a couple of years of living in Arizona, less and less items were being checked off my list. Then, one evening, I came home to find none of my list accomplished. I was frustrated. I remember wondering how he could be home all day and not do any of the items on my list. That evening, we had a conversation that…
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$#*! My Spouse Says
Chris: Because Michelle and I frequently commute from Tucson to Phoenix, we try to find stand-up comedians or funny books to listen to, to help pass the time. Recently, on one of those commutes, we began listening to the book. Sh*t My Dad Says, by Justin Halpern. While, we both heard our own fathers in many of Justin’s examples, we almost simultaneously said, “Wow I bet we could write a post about the $#*! you say.” While we realized we actually had enough material for a book, we are going to limit it to two examples. Michelle: When we were first married, Chris and I liked to ride our bikes…
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Marriage Wake-Up Calls
Chris: Many couples see the old couple, sitting on the park bench, still holding hands and wonder, how did they stay together after all this time. Michelle and I have thought, “Can we, the middle-aged couple, be an inspiration for someone? Does being married for only a couple of decades count?” While we are unsure of how inspiring we are, we have had a few wake-up calls in our relationship that we will share. The first wake-up call was our unmatched expectations. When we got married, we both brought marriage views based on our imaginations, our parents, movies, society, etc. My mom cooked, cleaned and rarely declined doing something for my dad. When we got…
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Does He Buy You Avocados
Chris: Michelle and I have been married for a while and have had our fair share of ups and downs. We have also gone through a lot of things together, some of which tested her patience with me and mine with her. But our marriage is a partnership. One in which I accept the differences between us as well as the little things that can drive me crazy, knowing she will do the same. Michelle: Recently, our twenty-five year old daughter and I were talking. I told her, I had some great new marriage advice: Marry the man that buys you avocados. This may sound like strange advice, but here’s…
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Lessons Learned We Have
Chris: I may be a bit biased, but I think very few movie franchises have had the global reach that Star Wars has. With their relatable characters, incredible fight scenes and ethical dilemmas, Star Wars has something for everyone. I think my wife, on the other hand, only watches because she knows how much I enjoy them. So, imagine my surprise, when Michelle said, “I think some of the lessons in Star Wars could be applicable to marriage.” My heart burst with pride and I couldn’t wait to get started. So, travel with us to a galaxy far, far away and we will share marriage lessons learned from Star Wars. Michelle: Lesson One: It is…
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Why Go It Alone
Michelle: When our daughter was three, she and I were walking out of Target. Before we walked out the door, I asked her to put her coat on. As I was putting my own coat on, I noticed that she was putting her coat on upside down. I bent down to try to help her when she yelled the inevitable three-year-old battle cry, “I can do it myself.” For approximately five minutes, I watched as she wriggled out of the coat, struggled because the sleeves were then inside out, finally getting the coat on correctly and proudly exclaiming, “See, I told you!” How many times have we all struggled, knowing…
