The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • listen Linda!
    Decision to Love,  Intimacy,  Listening

    Listen, Linda!!! Active Listening In Marriage

    August 3, 2026 / 2 Comments

    Did you ever watch the viral YouTube video called Listen, Linda? (Watch video) It’s pretty funny, but also good food for thought. Really, what we all want is to be heard and understood, which is part of being loved. But this is sometimes easier said than done. Easily Distracted & Uninclined: My Default Setting KEN: I’m easily distracted and not inclined to listen to things that don’t interest me. This naturally creates a challenge for good communication in our marriage.  JANINE: I like quiet time at home.  When I’m chipping away at my to-do list, or even when I’m doing dishes, I like to spend time with my own thoughts…

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    Annual Marriage Tune-Up

    August 23, 2020
    tired couple

    Kudos To The Tired Dad

    March 24, 2025

    Keeping Your Marriage Sane While Quarantined

    March 30, 2020
  • live your best life
    Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Finances,  Listening

    The BEST of Your Life

    May 4, 2026 / No Comments

    John:  “Today is the first day of the BEST of your life.”  I retired last Friday after 41 years of working in the IT field.  That quote was on the card I received from the team I led.  While it is certainly appropriate for retirement, it also rings true in our everyday life.  Every day, we can choose to live our best life, regardless of the changes, circumstances, and chaos around us. 

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    John and Julie

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    Listening = Love and Respect

    June 1, 2020
    signs pointing various directions

    Choose Your Hard

    October 10, 2022

    Forgiveness & Healing

    August 13, 2018
  • Happiness,  Listening

    Love Letters from Bellevue

    July 20, 2025 / 2 Comments

    Many of our readers have attended a Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience and sought to bring the tools home and use them every day. Little did we know, a couple of our readers, Joe and Helen have truly set the bar for making love letters a daily part of their lives. Married for more than 71 years now, we at The Couples Post are blessed and humbled to have heard their story and have this chance to share it with you in this touching video from the Eric’s Heroes feature on KOMO News out of Seattle. We invite you to listen to their story and hope you’re as inspired as we…

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    Nick and Jen

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    The Spontaneity Spark

    May 16, 2022

    Heart Cards

    February 7, 2022

    Little Wonders

    June 12, 2024
  • Accountability,  Listening

    Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship? (Repost)

    July 14, 2025 / No Comments

    The convenience our smartphones provide has come at a cost that we all feel. We see it when we’re out in public, with people staring at their phones rather than paying attention to their loved ones. One way of recognizing the problem with this comes from Drs. John and Julie Gottman – identifying how we make “bids” for attention from our partners. Paying attention to our cell phones makes it likely we’ll miss those bids and end up hurting each other.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Coasting

    April 12, 2026

    Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship?

    November 26, 2023
    Stones perfectly balanced against a background of the ocean

    Us Against the World

    August 22, 2021
  • Taking the Back Roads to a More Intimate Marriage
    Communication,  Happiness,  Listening,  Time

    Taking The Back Roads

    July 15, 2024 / No Comments

    Feeling disconnected from your spouse? Just like exploring scenic back roads, carve out "carefree timelessness" for deep conversations. Learn how simple coffee talks can unlock a universe of understanding and strengthen your marriage.

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    Go Anywhere, Do Anything

    June 9, 2025

    Love’s Sweet Spot

    March 9, 2020
    super-power of affirmation

    The Super-Power of Affirmation

    February 26, 2024
  • Communication,  Differences,  Listening

    You Say Goodbye and I Say Hello

    December 3, 2023 / No Comments

    You say good-bye and I say hello (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rblYSKz_VnI) is more than just an old Beatles song. Saying good-bye is rarely easy. Whether it be to a loved one in death, a move to a new city, a child going off to college, or changing jobs, good-byes are almost always painful. How we move through our good-byes can bring us closer to each other or pull us apart.

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    Scott and Karen

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    Just Do It

    “Just Do It!”

    September 28, 2026

    Does He Buy You Avocados

    June 19, 2023

    A Love That Surprises and Remembers

    February 10, 2020
  • Accountability,  Listening

    Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship?

    November 26, 2023 / No Comments

    The convenience our smartphones provide has come at a cost that we all feel. We see it when we’re out in public, with people staring at their phones rather than paying attention to their loved ones. One way of recognizing the problem with this comes from Drs. John and Julie Gottman – identifying how we make “bids” for attention from our partners. Paying attention to our cell phones makes it likely we’ll miss those bids and end up hurting each other.

    Read More
    Nick and Jen

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    Emotional Baggage

    February 3, 2026

    Coasting

    April 12, 2026
    Stones perfectly balanced against a background of the ocean

    Us Against the World

    August 22, 2021
  • couple with virtual reality goggles
    Conflict,  Differences,  Listening

    Opposing Perspectives

    November 6, 2023 / No Comments

    We can both be in the same room looking at the same situation but have remarkably different responses to whatever is going on.  Our perspective can be clouded by many things. You may think you’ve been kind and loving to your spouse – but later find out that they’re feeling lonely or unloved.  Your spouse may think they were respectful to you, but you think they were being patronizing or condescending. When it comes down to “he said, she said”, it’s possible that neither of you is seeing everything clearly.  How ‘Bout Some Netflix? One of the classic moments from our marriage that demonstrates this was one evening when Ken thought he’d…

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    A clean slate

    A Clean Slate

    January 2, 2023

    Mistakes Made During Conflict

    May 18, 2026

    Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice

    January 9, 2021
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Listening

    Be Ready

    July 11, 2022 / 1 Comment

    Chris: When I was a kid, I played whatever season’s sport was up.  One year during baseball season, the announcer realized that his typical way of calling batting order, player’s last name followed by ‘at bat’, ‘on deck’, or ‘in the hole’, would not be appropriate given my last name (Seaman). In the hole was quickly modified to ‘be ready’. While I may have been momentarily embarrassed by this obvious (and a little funny) change, the idea of ‘being ready’ stuck with me and has been a mantra of sorts for me throughout my life.  The first day I met Michelle, I told her I was going to marry her someday.  While she…

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    Chris and Michelle

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    Haven’t we had this fight before?

    October 21, 2019

    Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

    August 13, 2023

    Letters to Joy

    October 4, 2021
  • Couple in bed, woman on phone, husband upset
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Conflict,  Listening,  Time

    Is There Technoference in Your Marriage?

    June 13, 2022 / 3 Comments

    Recently, we read an article and learned a new word – “Technoference.”  This word “refers to the interruptions in interpersonal communication caused by attention paid to personal tech devices.”  Although we hadn’t heard of this word, we knew instantly that ‘Technoference’ is an issue in our marriage.   But Technology Is Useful… Most of the time, using our phones is not a big deal… technology is very useful. We love getting videos or pictures from our family.   We couldn’t do our jobs, keep in touch with others, or find our way around a new city without our phones.    However… Every once in a while, the phone in front of our spouse’s…

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    Married Singles

    August 21, 2023

    Mistakes Made During Conflict

    May 18, 2026
    Busy train

    The Busy Train

    January 15, 2024
12

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