Just. Do. It.

Julie

We just got back from the trip of a lifetime – a safari in Africa.  It was an unforgettable experience.  The variety of animals we saw, the beautiful landscapes that were so different from ours, the people we encountered, and a taste of the history and culture was something that touched us deeply.  But the trip was more than that…

It was a celebration of friendship between John and his closest friends.  They met on their first day of college years ago and have remained best friends.  This was the 60th birthday year for the group and so the plan was hatched about a year and a half ago to do something special in 2023.  We waffled on the Africa suggestion as we knew that it would already be an expensive year with our son getting married.  We decided to go anyway after one of the foursome died suddenly last fall when the stomach issues he’d struggled with all summer turned out to be deadly.  Last Friday, October 6, would have been his 60^th birthday.

Although tragic, our friend’s sudden death taught us many things.  We’d like to share a few with you.

LIFE IS SHORT, SO QUIT PROCRASTINATING

John

Life IS short, so don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.  You don’t need to wait for a birthday or anniversary to give flowers to your wife or to give your hubby a heartfelt card.  Also, doing something as a couple for a friend or family member is a fantastic way to build your sense of unity as life partners!  If you have somewhere you’ve always wanted to go or something you’ve always wanted to do together, make it a reality.  Whether it’s flying across the dance floor in each other’s arms or flying to an exotic locale for a romantic getaway, it’s never going to happen unless you MAKE it happen!  Just. Do. It.

PAY ATTENTION WHEN SOMETHING SEEMS OFF

Whether it’s your body telling you that something’s not quite right or your heart urging you to say you’re sorry and ask for forgiveness, don’t brush it off.  Addressing both head and heart issues before they careen out of control is crucial to staying physically healthy and keeping your relationship healthy.

TAKE NOTHING FOR GRANTED

Julie

Thank your spouse – and together thank your family and friends – not only for the things they do, but also for the person(s) they are.  Tell them what makes them special and show appreciation so they know that you don’t take them for granted.  John and I actually tell each other every day the quality we appreciate about each other that day.  I might tell John that I appreciate his thoughtfulness today as evidenced by his filling up my gas tank for me.  Genuine appreciation is a huge deposit in the emotional bank account. 

TELL THOSE YOU LOVE THAT YOU LOVE THEM…OFTEN!  TOMORROW IS NOT GUARANTEED

John

Call your mom.  Mend old hurts.  In the end, no issue is more important than love.  We have friends who haven’t spoken to family members in years due to opposing political views.  Agree to disagree and move on.  Accept and love them for who they are and they will hopefully do the same for you.  And tell them….tell them you love them and tell them again.  We end every phone call to each other and to our parents, siblings, and close friends with, “I (or we) love you.”  We send birthday and holiday and “just-because” cards and include a note on how thankful we are to have them in our lives.  We don’t ever want them to wonder about how we truly feel about them.

So what are you waiting for?  Just. Do. It.