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Top 10 Tips to Ruin Your Marriage
1. Put the Relationship on Autopilot Stop dating your spouse. Stop pursuing. You’ve won them, haven’t you? Transition into roommate mode. Cultivate separate lives, separate friends even separate interests. The marriage will take care of itself, the way houseplants do when you don’t water them. 😜 2. Stop Saying Thank You – It’s Overrated. Gratitude is for new relationships and people who are still trying to impress each other. Your spouse should know they’re appreciated. Stop saying thank you for dinner and other small things… it takes too much energy. 😫 3. Keep Score Marriage can be a competitive sport (with no trophy). Keep a mental spreadsheet of every chore, forgotten anniversary, and argument. Have this info at hand during arguments to ensure you always have the upper hand. 4. Outsource Intimacy …
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Behaviors, Communication, Conflict, Decision to Love, Forgiveness, Growth, Happiness, Perseverance, Resilience
Marriage – the Olympics of Relationships
Julie: John and I have really enjoyed watching the Olympics these past couple of weeks. Medals are won by fractions of a second. Partnerships are tested under pressure. Expectations run high. There is disappointment and elation. Marriage is the Olympics of Relationships. Both require preparation, endurance, resilience, and an unwavering commitment to something bigger than yourself.
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The Waiting is the Hardest Part
Sometimes, waiting is the hardest part. This is a classic season of waiting as children of all ages wait for Christmas and Santa and presents. As Christians in the Season of Advent, we are called to wait for the coming of our Savior. This is historical and ever-current at the same time. Our calling is to wait well, both looking forward to the future while accepting the present as the gift that it is.
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Go Anywhere, Do Anything
Chris: Over Memorial Day weekend, Michelle and I went wheeling in Moab, Utah, earning some Jeep badges along the way. We realized that some of the best off-road advice can be applied to our marriage. Here is our top five. Michelle: Number Five-Things will get gnarly. Moab is known for some of the best and trickiest off-road trails. But things can go from a calm day in nature to gnarly, real quick. We have learned that the same is true in our relationship. We have had a lot of smooth adventures in our marriage. But the true test of us comes from how we pull together when life does not…
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Hangry?
The challenges of caring for young grandchildren can cause stress and exhaustion, which can strain a relationship. It's important to recognize triggers that impact patience and communication. Empathy, forgiveness, and the importance of healing are important in times of stress.
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Angel With a Broken Wing
The Angel With a Broken Wing caught my attention. She sat on the front porch of Tom’s sister’s house for as long as I could remember and was a welcoming presence to all who entered.
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The Drift
Exciting Beginnings We all battle something called “the drift” in marriage. Before we get into that, let’s begin with a happy story. We just attended a wedding. It was so much fun celebrating with the newlywed couple. At the reception, one of the groomsmen spoke about how he noticed a change in his friend (the groom) after the bride and groom met. All of a sudden, this young man was asking for time off from work so he could spend time with the beautiful young woman in his life. He just couldn’t wait to spend time with her. New love is quite a phenomenon, isn’t it? There really are no…
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It Don’t Come Easy
“It don’t come easy” has been an ear-worm for us this year. It has become a positive force for reflection in our lives and journey. Sometimes it is the curve balls from left field that awaken us to the beauty that has been given to us. We only need to reframe the picture.
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Marriage Role Models
Who are your marriage role models? The number of couples choosing to get married is plummeting. Good solid marriages are less common than they used to be. Maybe YOUR marriage has been a role model for others – or maybe you would like to be. Role Models from Our Childhood Janine: As a kid I was surrounded by solid marriages – my parents, aunts and uncles, and grandparents were all in committed marriages. One solid memory that has stuck with me from my childhood was the feeling I had whenever I heard my dad call my mom “Lovey.” When Dad called Mom “Lovey” all was right with the world. His…
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Lessons on Marriage from a Houseplant
About 20 years ago, we received a pothos plant as a gift. This plant has been repotted numerous times. It has survived 4 relocations, including a move from one state to another and has remained resilient in our chaotic home with its five children and several pets. Over time, this pothos has taught us some lessons about how plants thrive. These lessons have helped our marriage thrive, too.
