The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • Perseverance

    If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain

    May 31, 2026 / No Comments

    Dolly Parton once said, “The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.”

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    Nick and Jen

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    Stale Crackers

    November 2, 2020

    Haven’t we had this fight before?

    October 21, 2019

    What did we sign up for?

    December 25, 2019
  • Accountability,  Perseverance,  Stress

    Does Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder?

    September 10, 2023 / No Comments

    This past week we had to spend time apart as Jen traveled cross-country to spend some time helping her sister. When we spend time apart, there is a natural distance between us. Time apart can put a strain on our relationship. It is the combination of not being together, combined with the stress of travel on the one away and the stress of holding down the fort on the one who stays at home.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Coasting

    April 12, 2026

    We Are More Than a Single Story

    December 12, 2022
    Couple shushing toward the camera

    What is the Secret to a Happy Marriage?

    February 27, 2022
  • Uncategorized

    Life is Full of Risks

    March 6, 2023 / 2 Comments

    Life is full of Risks. Financial, emotional, and physical – we take them all the time. There is nothing more endearing than hearing, “Again! Again! Again!” after swinging a toddler in the air. Children instinctively take risks. As we age, risk taking becomes intentional, calculated and requires effort, but staying in the safe zone is also taking a risk.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Lessons Learned We Have

    May 1, 2023

    Celebrate!

    July 1, 2024
    weighing planned versus spontaneity

    The Spontaneity Spark

    May 16, 2022
  • Accountability,  Communication,  Decision to Love,  Making Decisions,  Perseverance,  Stress

    Marriage Is a Teeter-Totter Ride

    July 18, 2022 / 2 Comments

    If you’ve spent time on a playground before 2004, you’ve probably hopped on a teeter-totter. Marriage is a teeter-totter ride. It can be relaxing, a gentle give and take. Marriage, like a teeter-totter can also be an experience of thrilling highs and the dizzying feeling of dropping low.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Candid Chris

    March 7, 2022

    Opposites Don’t Attract — They Attack

    January 29, 2023

    My Tip Troll

    May 30, 2022
  • Couple shushing toward the camera
    Accountability,  Differences,  Listening,  Perseverance

    What is the Secret to a Happy Marriage?

    February 27, 2022 / No Comments

    Most people don’t start out in marriage thinking “This could be fun for a while, but once it’s not I’ll move on.” When you get married it’s exciting and romantic and fun and interesting. But no marriage is free from challenges and disagreements. There is no magic finish line where there are no challenges in our marriage. The temptation to think such a place exists is one of the biggest dangers of all, because it sets you up for failure.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Mistakes Made During Conflict

    May 18, 2026

    Control in This Thing Called Life

    June 24, 2024

    Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship?

    November 26, 2023
  • Perseverance,  Stress,  Time

    Are We Broken?

    September 26, 2021 / No Comments

    When we are in the middle of a disagreement or are disconnected from one another, we may look around us and only see people doing marriage better than we do it. But no relationship is perfect and every relationship has its struggles. In all likelihood we are broken, but not any more broken than others.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Overcoming Apathy in our Marriage

    October 12, 2020
    couple facing away from each other

    Lost that Lovin’ feeling?

    May 29, 2023

    What Happened to the Person I Married?

    January 20, 2020
  • Conflict,  Perseverance,  Stress

    What Can’t You Afford to Edit out of Your Story?

    March 22, 2021 / 1 Comment

    Michelle: When I was a teenager, I remember coming home after breaking up with a guy and my dad asking me how it went. I gave the inevitable teenage response, “I don’t want to talk about it.” My dad responded, “You don’t have to. But you do need to remember that there are some things in life that you can’t afford to edit out of your story. Is this one of them?”

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    Chris and Michelle

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    Tip of the Iceberg

    October 2, 2023

    The 5 “P’s” of Constructive Feedback

    March 29, 2021
    empty nest kids squabbling

    The Empty Nest Revisited

    November 28, 2022
  • Children,  Decision to Love,  Making Decisions,  Parenting,  Perseverance

    Happy Holidays? In 2020? Yes!

    December 14, 2020 / No Comments

    “It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought,  doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”    ― Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Whether our holiday family traditions have been around for generations or started in our own marriage, one thing is for certain – 2020 has upended them all.

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    John and Julie

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    Getting Teens to Talk

    February 2, 2020
    couple holding each other

    The Drift 

    August 26, 2024
    tired couple

    Kudos To The Tired Dad

    March 24, 2025
  • Communication,  Differences,  Perseverance,  Stress,  Time

    Stale Crackers

    November 2, 2020 / No Comments

    It first struck us when we had to throw away all the crackers in the pantry because they were past their expiration date – it’s been a very, very long time since we’ve entertained a group of friends at home. We usually don’t eat crackers, but we do like to entertain people who might, especially if there are cracker toppings and wine involved. Throwing crackers away was a sad reminder of all the gatherings we would have had but didn’t because of COVID.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Marriage ScoreCard

    April 8, 2019

    The Benefit of the Doubt

    August 31, 2020
    signs pointing various directions

    Choose Your Hard

    October 10, 2022
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Forgiveness,  Perseverance,  Stress

    8 Ideas to Help Settle Disagreements in Marriage

    October 19, 2020 / No Comments

    “I disagree!”  “What?!?!”  “You don’t understand.” When husbands and wives disagree, things can get tense.  We dig in our heels, raise the volume, and let our emotions get the best of us.  Arguments can turn into a competition to win (as if anyone every truly “wins” in an argument). Whenever we hear ourselves say, “You always….,” or “You never…,” we know we’re marching down the wrong road.  So how can we settle disagreements?

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    Ken and Janine

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    Marriage ScoreCard

    April 8, 2019

    I Can’t Change My Spouse

    August 7, 2022
    writing a letter about what I love about you Just. Do. It.

    Just. Do. It.

    October 9, 2023
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