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The Busy Train
Julie All Aboard! We pile in the Busy Train and hang on for dear life, John in one car and me in another. The scenery flies by, until it becomes a blur. Distracted by responsibilities and commitments, we see each other only in passing. We talk at meals, but not about much, and not for long – too much to do! Cuddle time flies out the window as we work late into the night and then get up and do it all over again the next day. Stop the train! I want to get off!
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5 Reasons You Need a Getaway Without Kids
This post originally appeared on The Couples Post on Sept. 12, 2021. As we placed linen napkins on our laps for a fancy dinner, we realized life as we knew it was about to change. We were soon going to become parents. We’d enjoyed two wonderful years of marriage and wondered … would this be our last Getaway alone? Why get away without kids? 1. You and Your Marriage need Attention. Raising small humans takes constant attention. We can easily pour all our energy into them. We didn’t want to be strangers after the kids moved out, so we chose to intentionally invest time and energy into our relationship. Read…
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Our Anti-Resolution List
This post originally appeared on The Couples Post in Jan. 2022. We decided to re-post it this week as it offers some great ideas to ponder. Everyone at The Couples Post would like to wish our readers a Happy and Healthy 2024. Every New Year, articles pop up about making resolutions. This year, we have taken some common resolutions and would like to propose our own list. We are calling it Our Anti-Resolutions List 5. New vs. Old One of the most popular resolutions is to travel to NEW places. While we are a big supporter of seeking new adventures, in our anti-resolutions list, we offer, rediscovering the OLD places you have traveled to. Who cares that…
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Be Curious
Oh, to Be Curious like a child. If you have young kids or grandchildren, you know what we mean. “Why” and “How” are innocent questions, filled with wonder and awe. Pure curiosity.
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5 Bite Sized Ways to Become Better
Chris: Human beings are the only species on the planet who believe that we can be better today than we were yesterday. Still, many of us struggle to actually be better. Here are five ways to begin. One: Let Go Of Pre-existing Ideas that Do Not Make Sense to You. My mother-in-law once said that she couldn’t eat pizza unless she had a knife and fork to cut it with. I asked, “Have you ever just picked up a slice and ate it?” She looked disgusted. But, when the pizza came to the table, there were no knives. As we waited for her knife, I said, “Are we really going to waste a perfectly good pizza?” She…
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You Say Goodbye and I Say Hello
You say good-bye and I say hello (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rblYSKz_VnI) is more than just an old Beatles song. Saying good-bye is rarely easy. Whether it be to a loved one in death, a move to a new city, a child going off to college, or changing jobs, good-byes are almost always painful. How we move through our good-byes can bring us closer to each other or pull us apart.
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Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship?
The convenience our smartphones provide has come at a cost that we all feel. We see it when we’re out in public, with people staring at their phones rather than paying attention to their loved ones. One way of recognizing the problem with this comes from Drs. John and Julie Gottman – identifying how we make “bids” for attention from our partners. Paying attention to our cell phones makes it likely we’ll miss those bids and end up hurting each other.
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Happy Thanksgiving!
Happy Thanksgiving from the Couples Post! We hope that however you celebrate with your loved ones that you have a wonderful week. We will return with another post next week.
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Body Language
John It’s true – actions do speak louder than words. But body language can speak even louder. It’s easier to recognize how our spoken words and active behaviors affect our relationship. Body language is much more subtle than overt actions, but it does not lie. Body language, just like our verbal language, does need to be clarified, especially when it causes hurt. Things like posture, eye contact, and facial expressions can greatly affect the thermostat of our relationship. By being more conscious and intentional about how we express ourselves through our bodies, we can help that thermostat to stay on the warmer, more loving side rather than on the icy,…
