The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • Passion,  Romance

    Loving Your Way through February

    February 1, 2021 / No Comments

    It is said that February is the month for lovers. Having five kids in 10 years, Nick and I spent many years focusing on kid activities for Valentine’s Day. But romance has always been a priority for us, and if February has to be an excuse to be romantic, I say bring it on!

    Read More
    Nick and Jen

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    Quarantine Romance

    April 27, 2020
    weighing planned versus spontaneity

    The Spontaneity Spark

    May 16, 2022

    Marriage Magic

    December 16, 2019
  • super-power of affirmation
    Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Romance

    The Super-Power of Affirmation

    January 25, 2021 / 2 Comments

      JULIE: I’m not a superhero. While I can’t fly faster than a speeding bullet, make myself invisible, or read people’s minds, I CAN harness the super-power of affirmation by  telling John the numerous reasons he is special to me or the many traits I admire in him. Never underestimate the super-power of affirmation to build up your spouse and enhance your relationship.

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    John and Julie

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    angry couple

    Making Up is Hard to Do

    August 28, 2022

    Radical non-Parenting

    November 9, 2020

    Summertime Marriage

    July 7, 2024
  • Children,  Communication,  Decision to Love,  Parenting,  Romance

    Tell Her She’s Pretty and Let Him Go Golfing

    January 18, 2021 / No Comments

    Kids say the funniest things. But sometimes, the things they say can teach us a thing or two. Our friends Greg and Cecilia have five children between 1 and 11 years old. They asked their four oldest kids to answer some questions about marriage. Here’s what they had to say: Why do people get Married? Because they love each other. Because they kiss each other. How do you know Mom and Dad love each other?

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    Ken and Janine

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    3 Tips to Make Your Marriage Thrive

    August 20, 2019

    Heart Cards

    February 7, 2022

    Don’t Forget to Laugh

    January 13, 2025
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Stress

    Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice

    January 9, 2021 / No Comments

    Some time ago, we wrote about the importance of being aware of the Tone of Voice we use with our spouse. The gist of the post was that our Tone of Voice is the key culprit that begins most disagreements, hurts, and fights between spouses. We want to revisit this important topic and provide some additional helpful hints we’ve learned along the way.

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    Paul and Stephanie

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    Phones at the Dinner Table

    June 24, 2019

    Sex-pectations

    June 15, 2020

    What is Love Asking of Me Now?

    May 6, 2024
  • Communication,  Sex

    Sex: Spontaneous or Planned . . . Let the Conversation Begin

    January 4, 2021 / No Comments

    Happy New Year to all!  We are so grateful that 2020 is clearly in our rear-view mirror.  What a relief.  The start of a new year is traditionally set aside for reflection and resolutions.  For us, 2021 was no different. We often make couple as well as individual resolutions.  Stress and busyness, age and life in general had cooled our sexual relationship to a slow simmer.  Our 2021 goal is :  “Some is good.  More is better!”  Planned or spontaneous — all is good! Let the conversation begin.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

    August 13, 2023

    Heart Cards

    February 7, 2022
    Newly married couple holding hands tidbit of advice for married couples

    30 for 30! A Tidbit of Advice for Each Year of Marriage

    May 31, 2021
  • Communication,  Differences,  Stress

    The Elf on the Shelf

    December 21, 2020 / No Comments

    It’s that time of year – you know, when our kids are all on their best behavior and the most frequent threat you hear parents utter is “Santa is watching!” The latest craze is the Elf on the Shelf. The elf moves around your home, keeping its eye on your kids and causing a little mayhem along the way. Maybe your elf plays a game with a few of the stuffed animals in the house. Perhaps it gets into your cookie jar. Maybe it even spills flour in your kitchen. No matter what, the kids know it’s watching them. So, what if the elf was watching you and your spouse?…

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    Nick and Jen

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    Taking the Easy Road

    June 7, 2021

    Marriage Manners Matter

    June 17, 2019
    Positive advice on a napkin

    Sex — Naughty or Nice?

    June 27, 2021
  • Children,  Decision to Love,  Making Decisions,  Parenting,  Perseverance

    Happy Holidays? In 2020? Yes!

    December 14, 2020 / No Comments

    “It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought,  doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”    ― Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Whether our holiday family traditions have been around for generations or started in our own marriage, one thing is for certain – 2020 has upended them all.

    Read More
    John and Julie

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    The Empty Nest Repopulated – 4 Ways to make it Great!

    October 26, 2020
    Newly married couple holding hands tidbit of advice for married couples

    30 for 30! A Tidbit of Advice for Each Year of Marriage

    May 31, 2021

    The Happiest Place on Earth – NOT (this time)

    October 7, 2019
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Passion,  Romance,  Sex,  Time

    10 Things Women Want

    December 7, 2020 / No Comments

    1) Learn her “Love Language:” And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? ) Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank’ – her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us.  I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.

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    Ken and Janine

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    Heart Cards

    February 7, 2022
    Roamntic man and woman standing in front of a large flame

    4 Ways to Keep the Sexual Pilot Light Lit

    March 21, 2022

    Changing Our Dance and Learning to Love It

    July 6, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences

    A Plea For Real Men

    November 23, 2020 / 1 Comment

    Photo courtesy of Guillaume de Germain We know this is a blog for couples.  But GUYS, I (Mark) need to talk to you for a bit.  I want to talk you about being a Real Man. I get frustrated when I hear that a real man doesn’t show his feelings or make himself vulnerable, like it is a sign of weakness.

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    Mark and Mel

    You May Also Like

    Ready for a Marriage Check-up?

    February 16, 2026

    Tone of Voice

    July 16, 2018

    Speaking In Code

    January 23, 2023
  • Children,  Communication,  Conflict,  Differences,  Parenting,  Stress

    Rule #1 for Resolving Conflict

    November 15, 2020 / No Comments

    Paul: With our child rearing days behind us, I figured any potential conflict surrounding child rearing was over too. Boy was I mistaken. We took our 3 year old granddaughter with us to the beach for two weeks so she wouldn’t have to be in day care. While we were both looking forward to some quality time with her, I cringed when Stephanie suggested that we run point on potty training her. That’s when the trouble began. My attitude was, “Why do we have do this?” But instead of speaking up, I kept silent.

    Read More
    Paul and Stephanie

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    Getting Teens to Talk

    February 2, 2020

    Fair is Not Necessarily Equal

    December 13, 2021

    Can We Have Some Pickles with That Sandwich?

    September 15, 2020
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