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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
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  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
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  • patience
    Behaviors,  Conflict,  Differences,  Forgiveness

    Patience, Patience, Patience!

    October 21, 2024 / 1 Comment

    “Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.” Barbara Johnson Julie:  Our daughter-in-law is now 13 days overdue with our first grandchild.  We’ve known he was coming since Feb. 9, the news of his upcoming arrival being my best birthday present ever.  Looking back now, it seems like an eternity – and I’m not the one carrying him!  Patience may be a virtue, but it is certainly not one of mine.  This has been the cause of many rifts between John and me over the years.

    Read More
    John and Julie

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    February 28, 2023

    Just Go To Bed

    March 11, 2024

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    February 3, 2026
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Forgiveness,  Grief,  Passion,  Romance,  Sex

    The Healing Power of Touch

    July 22, 2024 / 1 Comment

    A previous blog explored a super power we all have within us – the Super Power of Affirmation.   But did you know that you possess another Super Power?  It’s the Healing Power of Touch.  Holy Hole in a Doughnut, Batman!  Bet you didn’t know you had all that in you!

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    John and Julie

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    Just. Do. It.

    October 9, 2023
  • Conflict,  Forgiveness

    Do You Remember the Last Fight You Had?

    June 16, 2024 / No Comments

    A number of years ago we heard a presentation that began with this question: “Do you remember the last fight you had?” Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott, the presenters that day, Good Fights–some thoughts from Drs Les and Leslie Parrott | ajournalofthejourney (wordpress.com) then gave the audience a few minutes to think about it and quickly share their answers with each other. We vividly remember the fight we shared:

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    Scott and Karen

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    June 21, 2018
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    Loving Each Other in Spite of Our Differences

    April 4, 2022

    Forgiveness & Healing

    August 13, 2018
  • Total eclipse of the heart
    Accountability,  Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Stress

    Total Eclipse of the Heart

    April 15, 2024 / 2 Comments

    Julie Did you see the Great American Eclipse?  If you were able to experience this rare cosmic phenomenon, you were lucky indeed.  It was truly beyond description and way cooler than we’d ever imagined (literally as well – the temp dropped about 20 degrees during totality).  A day later, Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” is still running around in my head…and I don’t mind.  But what I do mind is that I had a total eclipse of the heart in how I behaved towards John that day.

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    John and Julie

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    Running Up A Downward Escalator 

    May 11, 2026

    Get Real!

    October 30, 2023

    Table Talk

    April 25, 2022
  • Body language
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Forgiveness

    Body Language

    November 13, 2023 / No Comments

    John It’s true – actions do speak louder than words.  But body language can speak even louder.  It’s easier to recognize how our spoken words and active behaviors affect our relationship.  Body language is much more subtle than overt actions, but it does not lie.  Body language, just like our verbal language, does need to be clarified, especially when it causes hurt.  Things like posture, eye contact, and facial expressions can greatly affect the thermostat of our relationship.  By being more conscious and intentional about how we express ourselves through our bodies, we can help that thermostat to stay on the warmer, more loving side rather than on the icy,…

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    John and Julie

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    Love & Respect

    April 8, 2024

    Mistakes Made During Conflict

    May 18, 2026

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    May 30, 2022
  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Forgiveness

    Removing the Invisibility Cloak

    October 23, 2023 / No Comments

    Chris: When we first moved to Arizona from Oklahoma, I went from an on-site job, to working from home.  My being home meant that my “honey-do” list grew, because my wife thought my lack of travel to an office could afford me plenty of time to complete all kinds of projects.   Michelle: After a couple of years of living in Arizona, less and less items were being checked off my list.  Then, one evening, I came home to find none of my list accomplished. I was frustrated.  I remember wondering how he could be home all day and not do any of the items on my list. That evening, we had a conversation that…

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    Chris and Michelle

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    Smiling is a Superpower

    February 28, 2023
    patience

    Patience, Patience, Patience!

    October 21, 2024
    marriage requires commitment like the olympics

    Marriage – the Olympics of Relationships

    February 23, 2026
  • wedding toast
    Children,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Happiness,  Making Decisions,  Parenting,  Romance

    A Toast

    July 31, 2023 / No Comments

    John: Well, it finally happened!  The wedding of the century (at least OUR century so far) arrived and now our nuclear family of 5 has become 6! The look on our son’s face was priceless as his beautiful beaming bride turned the corner, walking down the aisle toward him and their future together.  A hint of the boy he once was shone through the giant smile of the incredible man he’d become,  We knew this would be an emotional day, one filled with joy as our son pledged a lifetime of love and commitment to his beloved and she to him.  We weren’t prepared for how deep those emotions would…

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    John and Julie

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    Our Wedding Vows, Revisited

    December 19, 2021

    Happy Holidays? In 2020? Yes!

    December 14, 2020
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    The Empty Nest Revisited

    November 28, 2022
  • forgive me note
    Conflict,  Forgiveness

    Chat GPT’s Advice about Forgiveness & Healing

    April 24, 2023 / 1 Comment

    KEN: Who else out there has been caught up in the Chat GPT craze? I thought it might be fun to see what Chat GPT has to say about Forgiveness and Healing in Marriage. Here’s what Chat GPT told me… Chat GPT’s Conclusions about Forgiveness and Healing “Forgiveness and healing are essential for any marriage that has experienced hurt or pain. By acknowledging the hurt, practicing empathy, letting go of resentment, being patient, and creating a plan for moving forward, couples can work together to rebuild their relationship and create a stronger, healthier bond. Remember, forgiveness is not always easy, but it is necessary for a happy and fulfilling marriage.”…

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    Ken and Janine

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    February 16, 2025

    Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice

    September 14, 2025
    Newly married couple holding hands tidbit of advice for married couples

    30 for 30! A Tidbit of Advice for Each Year of Marriage

    May 31, 2021
  • 4 horsemen
    Communication,  Conflict,  Forgiveness

    The 4 Horsemen

    March 13, 2023 / No Comments

    Relationship researcher John Gottman has identified four negative behaviors he calls ‘The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse,’ that spell disaster for relationships.⁠  Identifying these Four Horsemen is the first step in being able to replace them with healthier behaviors.  Turn The Horse Around KEN:   As a “see the glass ½ empty” kind of person, it’s easy for me to be critical of Janine. We not only are different sexes but have different personality types and different ways of doing things. As a perfectionist, I have a tendency toward criticizing little things Janine does. This tendency hasn’t disappeared, but I’ve learned what I’m doing and how it negatively affects Janine and our…

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    Ken and Janine

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    I Could Use Some Help!

    September 7, 2020
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    Is There Technoference in Your Marriage?

    June 13, 2022
  • A clean slate
    Behaviors,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Making Decisions

    A Clean Slate

    January 2, 2023 / No Comments

    A new year is here.  A fresh start.  A clean slate.  Whatever bad things may have happened in 2022 are behind us and we are free to dream about the possibilities of 2023.  Wouldn’t it be awesome if we could start over TODAY with a clean slate in our marriage? 

    Read More
    John and Julie

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