• Behaviors,  Happiness,  Stress

    The Thief

    You may not realize it, but you’re being robbed. Right now.  The thief comes in many forms. It comes in the form of stress, anxiety, fear of failure, addiction, self-centeredness, or letting ourselves get too busy.  No matter what form the thief comes in, it does the same thing every time. It robs us of the joy, peace and closeness with each other.   Finances, in-laws, problems with sex, lack of communication, work, “busyness,” hobbies…  Whatever our “thief” is… Why do we let this thief take over? And what could be more important than re-evaluating, re-prioritizing and NOT letting any thief rob us of joy?  Ken: The thief strikes most…

  • playful couple contagious love
    Behaviors,  Passion,  Playfulness

    Contagious Love

    Julie: Our son is getting married in six weeks and four days – but who’s counting?  He is our first child to tie the knot, and we are beyond excited!   Last weekend was our first bridal shower.  It was a delight to watch our son and future daughter-in-law as they were showered with gifts and, more importantly, with love from our family and friends.  It was a day of joy, fun, and laughter.  It even brought a few tears as I thought about my mom and sister and how much they would have loved our daughter-in-law to be and enjoyed celebrating this moment in our son’s life.   As I…

  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Decision to Love

    Why Go It Alone

      Michelle: When our daughter was three, she and I were walking out of Target.  Before we walked out the door, I asked her to put her coat on. As I was putting my own coat on, I noticed that she was putting her coat on upside down. I bent down to try to help her when she yelled the inevitable three-year-old battle cry, “I can do it myself.” For approximately five minutes, I watched as she wriggled out of the coat, struggled because the sleeves were then inside out, finally getting the coat on correctly and proudly exclaiming, “See, I told you!”  How many times have we all struggled, knowing…

  • Behaviors,  Happiness,  Playfulness

    Smiling is a Superpower

    Michelle: I think that at some point in every person’s life, they dream about what kind of superhero they might be and what powers they might have.  When I was a child, I wasn’t sure what my costume would look like or my catchphrase might be, but when I envisioned myself striking that superhero pose, I was there to turn frowns upside-down!  A few years ago, I went to a laughter therapy seminar.  During this seminar, the presenter shared that there have been multiple studies regarding smiling and success.  In one such study, scientists conducted research over a thirty-year period. They reviewed five hundred student’s yearbook photos and, measuring just the student’s smile, were able…

  • Behaviors,  Communication

    Speaking In Code

    Michelle: When our daughter was four, she got out of the car, walked in the house and promptly asked me what a HUHA was. I wasn’t sure what she meant so I asked her where she had heard it. She said that someone cut them off in traffic and that her daddy yelled out the word. I mumbled something about it meaning a bad driver although I had figured out that it was Head Up His/Her As$. Chris: As Taryn got older, we went from spelling out S-A-N-T-A, to non-verbal cues like head nods towards an item or saying something like, “I bet Santa could bring something like this.” As…

  • A clean slate
    Behaviors,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Making Decisions

    A Clean Slate

    A new year is here.  A fresh start.  A clean slate.  Whatever bad things may have happened in 2022 are behind us and we are free to dream about the possibilities of 2023.  Wouldn’t it be awesome if we could start over TODAY with a clean slate in our marriage? 

  • Accountability,  Behaviors,  Communication,  Differences

    We Are More Than a Single Story

    Michelle: Recently for work, we watched a TED talk titled, “The Danger of a Single Story”.   The presenter, a Nigerian author, shared that she left Nigeria as a 19-year-old, to attend a university in the United States.  Her roommate knew, before they met, her age and where she was from.  When they met for the first time, her surprised roommate asked her where she learned to speak English so well.  She responded, “Well, English is the official language of Nigeria.”  Her roommate also asked her if she had any recordings of the tribal music that they listen to.  The author shared that she tremendously disappointed her roommate when she produced a tape of Mariah Carey.  Her roommate had…

  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Honesty,  Making Decisions,  Playfulness,  Stress,  Time

    3 Tips to Reduce Holiday Stress

    Like it or not, the Holidays are upon us. Jack-o-Lanterns may still be on the porches, but Christmas will be here before we know it. Here are 3 practical tips to reduce Holiday stress and find Joy as the Countdown to Christmas continues.

  • Behaviors,  Communication,  Conflict

    In Sickness and In Health

    Michelle: Over the course of our married life, we have discovered topics in which we have differing opinions.  One such topic is how we respond to being sick.  Thankfully, we do not revisit this topic very often but rest assured, it always comes up when one or both of us is sick!   Chris: Recently, Michelle woke up with what she described as, “a bit of a scratchy throat”.  By lunchtime, it was obvious, she wasn’t feeling well.   Later that evening, Michelle was running a fever, coughing and her voice had gone from a sexy Demi Moore voice into more of a Dudley Moore voice.  Michelle: While technically, I suppose the symptoms Chris is describing probably would…

  • Couple in bed, woman on phone, husband upset
    Behaviors,  Communication,  Conflict,  Listening,  Time

    Is There Technoference in Your Marriage?

    Recently, we read an article and learned a new word – “Technoference.”  This word “refers to the interruptions in interpersonal communication caused by attention paid to personal tech devices.”  Although we hadn’t heard of this word, we knew instantly that ‘Technoference’ is an issue in our marriage.   But Technology Is Useful… Most of the time, using our phones is not a big deal… technology is very useful. We love getting videos or pictures from our family.   We couldn’t do our jobs, keep in touch with others, or find our way around a new city without our phones.    However… Every once in a while, the phone in front of our spouse’s…