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Holiday Traditions
‘Tis the holiday season, full of hope, joy, and expectation. For many of us, it’s the perfect time of year to have expectations clash with reality and make little grinches of all of us. No! There must be a way to see Christmas is coming. With Jen in her kerchief and Nick in his cap, we soon settle down for a short jaunt into… holiday traditions.
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You Don’t Bring Me Flowers 💐
There’s an old Barbara Streisand / Neil Diamond song “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers” that sometimes hops to mind when we’re in a rough patch or we see other couples we know in a rough spot. Who would know how much a simple gift can impact your relationship as a couple? But beware! Even bringing flowers home can be more complicated than you’d expect.
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Ugh, Mom and Dad, no PDA! 🤢 (Repost)
Nick: Call it a “sixth sense,” but I can tell when my kids’ eyes are on Jen and me. I can practically hear their eyes rolling whenever we touch each other.
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I Can’t Change My Spouse
Be honest. How many of us find ourselves wondering “how much better would my marriage be, if not for the obvious shortcomings of the person I’m married to?” If only I could change my spouse! But the hard truth is, I can’t.
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Marriage in 3-D 👓
At the end of this week we will celebrate 27 years of marriage. Since the number 27 is equal to 3³, what better opportunity do we have than now to talk about our marriage in 3-D?
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Marriage is a Minefield
We walked into marriage blissfully unaware of any danger. Although we did get advice from more seasoned couples, nobody warned us that marriage is a minefield. Careless Early Explosions Jen: When we had only been married for about three years, we stepped on one of our first big landmines. It started out as a conversation about balancing the checkbook. We took turns with this task and looking at our finances so we both could see how our money was spent, but our perspectives were different. Nick was the main breadwinner while I was the main caretaker at home. Our different responsibilities made us biased to our own perspectives. Instead of…
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Not All Habits Are Bad
The word habit is often seen in a negative context. But not all habits are bad and building good habits in your marriage can make you stronger as a couple.
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What is the Secret to a Happy Marriage?
Most people don’t start out in marriage thinking “This could be fun for a while, but once it’s not I’ll move on.” When you get married it’s exciting and romantic and fun and interesting. But no marriage is free from challenges and disagreements. There is no magic finish line where there are no challenges in our marriage. The temptation to think such a place exists is one of the biggest dangers of all, because it sets you up for failure.
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Our “One of a Kind” Marriage
Our marriage is one of a kind. While we’re two people who have come from different places, we put together our past and present influences to become something new. Looking Inside My Family of Origin Jen: Family of origin has had a strong influence on our marriage. My parents stayed married throughout my childhood. I saw elements of disharmony, but since my parents were still together, I brushed off any worry. When I was in college, my parents divorced. The disharmony had gotten worse over time, and I figured this must be the natural progression of marriage. I met Nick not long after my parents split, and we got serious…
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Fair is Not Necessarily Equal
A classic line out of any child’s mouth is “It’s not fair!” Children use this line to cover everything from chores to birthday parties to bedtimes. It’s a comparison game, but in the end, fair isn’t necessarily equal.
