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Lessons on Marriage from a Houseplant
About 20 years ago, we received a pothos plant as a gift. This plant has been repotted numerous times. It has survived 4 relocations, including a move from one state to another and has remained resilient in our chaotic home with its five children and several pets. Over time, this pothos has taught us some lessons about how plants thrive. These lessons have helped our marriage thrive, too.
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Are We Scrolling by Our Relationship?
The convenience our smartphones provide has come at a cost that we all feel. We see it when we’re out in public, with people staring at their phones rather than paying attention to their loved ones. One way of recognizing the problem with this comes from Drs. John and Julie Gottman – identifying how we make “bids” for attention from our partners. Paying attention to our cell phones makes it likely we’ll miss those bids and end up hurting each other.
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Happy Thanksgiving!
Happy Thanksgiving from the Couples Post! We hope that however you celebrate with your loved ones that you have a wonderful week. We will return with another post next week.
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How Do We Stay Connected When We’re Busy?
“What time are you done working today?” “Why? Is there some place I need to be?” “Well, our son has band practice and all the other drivers in our household are either working or at school, so it’s got to be one of us.” “OK, you take the drop off and I’ll get us ready for the meeting we have to attend…” How many of you have had a conversation like this? It’s a common thing for married people with kids to be pulled in multiple directions and be forced into divide-and-conquer mode. But in the midst of this, how do we stay connected and on the same page as…
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Does Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder?
This past week we had to spend time apart as Jen traveled cross-country to spend some time helping her sister. When we spend time apart, there is a natural distance between us. Time apart can put a strain on our relationship. It is the combination of not being together, combined with the stress of travel on the one away and the stress of holding down the fort on the one who stays at home.
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Little Moments in Time
The word summer brings to mind images of relaxing on the beach, swimming in the pool, hiking, picnicking and the like. Every summer we have high hopes that we will get to enjoy some lazy days and lolly-gagging, taking life at a slower pace and relaxing.
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When It Doesn’t Work Out💔
One of the most jarring things you can experience as a married couple is when someone you love tells you they are getting divorced, especially when it comes unexpectedly. Recently, friends of ours told us they were planning on getting a divorce. Being told this generated a whole host of emotions and judgments.
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Letting the Cat Out of the Bag😼
Isn’t it funny how our pets’ behaviors can help us see better who we are inside? As a married couple, what can we learn from this?
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Old Habits Die Hard
Have you ever fallen into this trap? You have a small disconnect that builds over time and turns into a huge disconnect that takes a lot of work to sort through, but you get through it. Then some time down the road, you start to fall back into whatever habit it was that disconnected you. You realize it and work through it again, but you’re kicking yourself for falling into the same trap. And you think to yourself, ‘why didn’t I learn the lesson the first time?’ Disconnection Jen: We had a disconnect of this sort this past week. I fell into an old habit of bottling up my frustration…
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Post-Holidays – Blues or Bliss?🎄📦
The holidays have come and gone. As we’re taking down lights and packing away decorations, we thought we’d take a little time to reflect on how our different attitudes in the post-holiday season impact our relationship.
