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5 Things Men Want
1. RESPECT: (KEN): When a man is asked, ‘Would you rather be respected or loved?’ most would choose being respected. In his book Love and Respect, Dr. E. Eggerichs explains this tendency. (JANINE): For years, I didn’t appreciate how important it was to Ken that I treat him with respect. I also didn’t understand how hurtful it was when I disrespected him. When I show Ken respect (by affirming his decisions, avoiding sarcasm or by not using a demeaning tone) it translates (for him) into feeling ‘loved.’ Another way to say this is: when a man is disrespected, he receives the message he is NOT loved. 2. SEX:
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When All Else Fails . . . Eat Ice Cream
For many of us the COVID honeymoon is long over. Isolation, loss of routines, access to the gym, financial worries, working from home and changing school schedules has had us stretched too thin too long. We’d rather eat an entire loaf of bread than bake one and if we hear how much someone enjoys the extra time with their kids we’ll scream! This is COVID Stress. We’ve all experienced it.
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The Super-Power of Affirmation
JULIE: I’m not a superhero. While I can’t fly faster than a speeding bullet, make myself invisible, or read people’s minds, I CAN harness the super-power of affirmation by telling John the numerous reasons he is special to me or the many traits I admire in him. Never underestimate the super-power of affirmation to build up your spouse and enhance your relationship.
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Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice
Some time ago, we wrote about the importance of being aware of the Tone of Voice we use with our spouse. The gist of the post was that our Tone of Voice is the key culprit that begins most disagreements, hurts, and fights between spouses. We want to revisit this important topic and provide some additional helpful hints we’ve learned along the way.
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Happy Holidays? In 2020? Yes!
“It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” ― Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Whether our holiday family traditions have been around for generations or started in our own marriage, one thing is for certain – 2020 has upended them all.
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10 Things Women Want
1) Learn her “Love Language:” And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? ) Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank’ – her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us. I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.
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A Plea For Real Men
Photo courtesy of Guillaume de Germain We know this is a blog for couples. But GUYS, I (Mark) need to talk to you for a bit. I want to talk you about being a Real Man. I get frustrated when I hear that a real man doesn’t show his feelings or make himself vulnerable, like it is a sign of weakness.
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Radical non-Parenting
One of the hardest challenges of staying in relationship with married children is to cease parenting and to simply be a parent. When children marry we do not simply welcome a new member into the family. The marriage of a child radically changes family dynamics and relationships. Tying the knot in marriage is as profound as cutting the cord at birth.
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Overcoming Apathy in our Marriage
Courtesy of Cottonbro on Pexels Cloudy fall days, work stress, our daughter moving 4 states away… daily political calls, longing to return to normal life… Our souls have felt weary lately. We’ve felt lazy towards our relationship, too: choosing not to resolve little issues when they arise, being less affectionate, watching more TV, and even falling asleep without saying good night. Basically, we’ve been apathetic about life and about our marriage.
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Supporting Your Spouse While Maintaining Individuality
Photo by Alexa Williams When we were dating, supporting each other in our hopes and dreams seemed easy. As we get older, it is more difficult at times to set aside our own individual wants and focus on each other’s desires. We’ve noticed that the times we were strongest as a couple were the very times we set our own desires aside in order to support each other in the ways we each needed most.
