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Overcoming Apathy in our Marriage
Courtesy of Cottonbro on Pexels Cloudy fall days, work stress, our daughter moving 4 states away… daily political calls, longing to return to normal life… Our souls have felt weary lately. We’ve felt lazy towards our relationship, too: choosing not to resolve little issues when they arise, being less affectionate, watching more TV, and even falling asleep without saying good night. Basically, we’ve been apathetic about life and about our marriage.
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Supporting Your Spouse While Maintaining Individuality
Photo by Alexa Williams When we were dating, supporting each other in our hopes and dreams seemed easy. As we get older, it is more difficult at times to set aside our own individual wants and focus on each other’s desires. We’ve noticed that the times we were strongest as a couple were the very times we set our own desires aside in order to support each other in the ways we each needed most.
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Pushing Buttons
Make your own memes at imgflip.com Being married to someone for a long time doesn’t just build a family, it also builds familiarity. You know exactly what buttons you can push with your spouse. It’s like a superpower in a way, and with great power comes great responsibility.
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I Could Use Some Help!
You may have heard the analogy that men are like waffles, women like spaghetti. Neuroscientists have found that typically the male brain focuses on one thing at a time while females tend to mentally juggle multiple thoughts. For example, when a man is doing the dishes, he’s thinking about…the dishes. When a woman is doing the dishes, she might be thinking about the grocery list, that salad for the picnic on Saturday, the dentist appointment tomorrow, and that she needs to call her parents to see how they’re doing. All this mental and emotional work is invisible, but it can be exhausting.
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The Benefit of the Doubt
Courtesy of Pixabay via Pexels The image of a pebble dropped into a still pond is a powerful one for many people. It is a visual representation of the idea that one small act can have a “ripple effect.” It can spread out and be carried across the water of our life and the lives of those around us further than we may perceive. Giving the benefit of the doubt can be that pebble in your relationship with your spouse.
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Annual Marriage Tune-Up
A number of years ago, some friends of ours told us about a little trick they use to keep their marriage healthy, strong, and vibrant. Every year, they pledge to attend some kind of marriage enrichment event together. According to our friends, this does not mean weekend getaways to the beach, skiing, or going to a bed and breakfast together.
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Dream a Little Dream With Me
“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” Dr. Seuss July 20, 2020. John: What seemed like an ordinary Monday was anything but, all because of the vows we made to each other exactly 29 years prior. As Julie’s brother called to wish us a happy anniversary, he congratulated us and commented that we were “living the dream.” You know what? He was right.
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8 Misunderstandings That Are Hurting Your Sex Life
Why are we writing about sex again? Sex in marriage is more important than most people think. It’s mysterious. There are a lot of “layers” and complexities to this whole topic…. read on…
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Going to Bat for Your Spouse
“There’s a bat in the house!” John: Sometimes life presents unexpected opportunities for closeness. A few Sundays ago, a bat suddenly appeared, swooping and darting around the family room before settling into a hanging position above the fireplace.
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Reaching Out – Together
JULIE: During this bizarre time when we are all quarantined, I need reassurance that our friends and family members are safe and in a good place mentally. This is especially true of our young adult kids who are not only dealing with social isolation, but also unemployment. I also worry about our parents and siblings, especially my dad as he lives alone.
