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4 Steps to Resolve Disagreements in Marriage
This week we decided to share something we clipped out of a newspaper a few years ago with the title: How to Resolve Disagreements in Marriage, by Nina Chen, Ph.D. A quick google search led us to the online version here: http://missourifamilies.org/features/divorcearticles/divorcefeature45.htm Here’s what Dr. Chen, a Human Development Specialist with the University of Missouri Extension, has to say: “There is no perfect marriage. Even happy, healthy marriages involve some conflict from time to time. Conflict is a normal part of sharing life with someone else. The key is to know how to deal with disagreement and conflict in a constructive way. These steps can help: 1. Set a specific…
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Married Couples: Are We Too Busy?
We often find our identity in what we accomplish. Our activities and responsibilities can build up until we are crushed beneath them. Are we so busy that we miss out on beauty, relationship, and belonging? Have we become ‘human doings’ rather than ‘human beings.’ It’s hard to grow our marriage if we’re too busy to BE with each other. Busy Families JANINE: If you grew up on a farm like I did, you might remember the ‘breakneck’ pace of harvest or planting time. During those busy days, both Dad and Mom were working intense hours and running on little sleep. This extraordinary pace was for the short-term and my parents knew…
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30 Seconds of Passion
LARRY: When life gives you lemons (or a Covid pandemic) – make lemonade. When Covid hit, my wife Jula and I decided to turn our quarantine into a second honeymoon. We made the most of the extra time we had together by being romantic and talked about areas of our relationship that we’d actively avoided. Well …after about 6 months of this second honeymoon, life threw us a few curveballs and the proverbial ‘honeymoon wore off.’ Some months later, I had a dream where I got the idea of “30 Seconds of Passion.”
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5 Reasons You Need a Getaway Without Kids
As we placed linen napkins on our laps for a fancy dinner, we realized life as we knew it was about to change. We were soon going to become parents. We’d enjoyed two wonderful years of marriage and wondered … would this be our last Getaway alone?
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“Just Let Me do That!”
Resentment, frustration, bitterness. Where do these come from? Sometimes, they’re a result of treating our spouse as “inferior” (due to our own attitude of superiority). Superiorities are something we all have, even if we don’t realize it.
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Trash Talk
Our first heated “discussion” as a married couple wasn’t about what people call the “important” stuff – our values, family, money, jobs, or kids. Instead, our first “couple argument” was a top of the lungs, door-slamming, Tupperware-throwing, window rattling discussion about – our trash cans. We weren’t discussing color, size, number, or shape of our trash cans. We both pretty much agreed that a trash can is a trash can and should definitely look like a trash can. No issues there. Our fight was about who, of the two of us, would be deemed (for eternity and thereafter) the primary trash can “dragger” each and every week – 52 times…
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Money Can’t Buy Me Love… 😍
Ken: It’s all over the news…. First Jeff Bezos and now Bill Gates have become divorcees. Two of the richest men in the world didn’t find married bliss, so how am I supposed to? How do we find lasting happiness in our marriage? My mom has always said…
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5 Things Men Want
1. RESPECT: (KEN): When a man is asked, ‘Would you rather be respected or loved?’ most would choose being respected. In his book Love and Respect, Dr. E. Eggerichs explains this tendency. (JANINE): For years, I didn’t appreciate how important it was to Ken that I treat him with respect. I also didn’t understand how hurtful it was when I disrespected him. When I show Ken respect (by affirming his decisions, avoiding sarcasm or by not using a demeaning tone) it translates (for him) into feeling ‘loved.’ Another way to say this is: when a man is disrespected, he receives the message he is NOT loved. 2. SEX:
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Tell Her She’s Pretty and Let Him Go Golfing
Kids say the funniest things. But sometimes, the things they say can teach us a thing or two. Our friends Greg and Cecilia have five children between 1 and 11 years old. They asked their four oldest kids to answer some questions about marriage. Here’s what they had to say: Why do people get Married? Because they love each other. Because they kiss each other. How do you know Mom and Dad love each other?
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10 Things Women Want
1) Learn her “Love Language:” And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? ) Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank’ – her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us. I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.
