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Radical non-Parenting
One of the hardest challenges of staying in relationship with married children is to cease parenting and to simply be a parent. When children marry we do not simply welcome a new member into the family. The marriage of a child radically changes family dynamics and relationships. Tying the knot in marriage is as profound as cutting the cord at birth.
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Stale Crackers
It first struck us when we had to throw away all the crackers in the pantry because they were past their expiration date – it’s been a very, very long time since we’ve entertained a group of friends at home. We usually don’t eat crackers, but we do like to entertain people who might, especially if there are cracker toppings and wine involved. Throwing crackers away was a sad reminder of all the gatherings we would have had but didn’t because of COVID.
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The Empty Nest Repopulated – 4 Ways to make it Great!
Julie: When our kids were small, it was easy to keep peace in the nest. Mama and Daddy bird had the final say and that was it. Ah, little kids, little problems. Things got a little trickier as those baby birds grew into fledglings. As our kids grew and stretched their wings, they asserted their increasing independence and often challenged our rules and decisions. As young adults who have left the nest, they are more respectful when they return home, but things can still get a little tense as we are still their parents and they are still our kids.
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8 Ideas to Help Settle Disagreements in Marriage
“I disagree!” “What?!?!” “You don’t understand.” When husbands and wives disagree, things can get tense. We dig in our heels, raise the volume, and let our emotions get the best of us. Arguments can turn into a competition to win (as if anyone every truly “wins” in an argument). Whenever we hear ourselves say, “You always….,” or “You never…,” we know we’re marching down the wrong road. So how can we settle disagreements?
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Overcoming Apathy in our Marriage
Courtesy of Cottonbro on Pexels Cloudy fall days, work stress, our daughter moving 4 states away… daily political calls, longing to return to normal life… Our souls have felt weary lately. We’ve felt lazy towards our relationship, too: choosing not to resolve little issues when they arise, being less affectionate, watching more TV, and even falling asleep without saying good night. Basically, we’ve been apathetic about life and about our marriage.
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Supporting Your Spouse While Maintaining Individuality
Photo by Alexa Williams When we were dating, supporting each other in our hopes and dreams seemed easy. As we get older, it is more difficult at times to set aside our own individual wants and focus on each other’s desires. We’ve noticed that the times we were strongest as a couple were the very times we set our own desires aside in order to support each other in the ways we each needed most.
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Finding Solid Ground — 7 Steps
Fall ushers in beautiful color, long shadows and cooler weather. Parents and kids thrive with the routine of school. This fall is anything but typical as we grow even more weary of the pandemic. We worry about finances and fret as to whether to send kids to school or stay virtual. With wildfires and hurricanes of epic proportion and a looming election, it seems the social fabric of our country is being ripped to shreds. In these stressful times, how do we find solid ground? Photo Credit: Nik Shuliahin
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Pushing Buttons
Make your own memes at imgflip.com Being married to someone for a long time doesn’t just build a family, it also builds familiarity. You know exactly what buttons you can push with your spouse. It’s like a superpower in a way, and with great power comes great responsibility.
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Radical non-Parenting
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Can We Have Some Pickles with That Sandwich?
JULIE: It is 7 a.m. and I’m awake before the alarm, mind racing as I go over the mental checklist of what needs to be done today. John is out cold. He is exhausted from the physical and mental demands of the past week of caring for his parents while helping them sort through and pack up a lifetime’s worth of belongings. Now it is moving day, the day they will start their final chapter together in assisted living. The melancholy in the air is stifling.
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I Could Use Some Help!
You may have heard the analogy that men are like waffles, women like spaghetti. Neuroscientists have found that typically the male brain focuses on one thing at a time while females tend to mentally juggle multiple thoughts. For example, when a man is doing the dishes, he’s thinking about…the dishes. When a woman is doing the dishes, she might be thinking about the grocery list, that salad for the picnic on Saturday, the dentist appointment tomorrow, and that she needs to call her parents to see how they’re doing. All this mental and emotional work is invisible, but it can be exhausting.
