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The 7 Best Things We’ve Done for Our Marriage
Here’s our ‘Short List’ of the 7 best things we’ve done that have had the biggest impact on our marriage… 1. Love Languages The 5 Love Languages – In this book, Dr Gary Chapman explains there are 5 basic love languages and we each have a primary “language.” We might be knocking ourselves out trying to show our spouse we love them, but it doesn’t necessarily translate into him/her feeling loved….IF we’re not speaking THEIR language. When we read this short book together and learned to speak each other’s language, it was a game changer for us. To learn more, read: What Language are you Speaking? 2. Finances Get on the Same Page…
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Autumn is Proof that Change is Beautiful
“Autumn is proof that change is beautiful” was a quote we saw at Hobby Lobby last month. I told Tom, I don’t think I would ever use change and beautiful in the same sentence. But this quote has stuck with me like an ear worm.
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3 Ways to Date Your Spouse
Michelle: As a couple, if we do not continue to pursue one another, we could wake up one day to find that we have become roommates. The foundation of our relationship was built on friendship and romance. Here are three easy ways that we have come up with to continue to nourish that foundation. 1. Look for Opportunities to Connect: When we were dating, Chris was constantly calling me, asking me to go grab a drink with him or even simply ride a bike together or take a walk. After we got married and started raising our family, our connections went from intentional time to be together and check in,…
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Knowing and Loving
Back in 1958, a group known as The Teddy Bears recorded the song, “To Know Him is to Love Him.” To Know Him Is To Love Him (youtube.com) It’s kind of a schmaltzy ballad, to be sure, but thinking of the title of the song causes us to wonder: how many of us really know our spouse… really know them…beyond “The Newlywed Game” know them? Do we know their innermost thoughts and feelings, their joys and sorrows, griefs and anxieties, hopes and dreams? The Journal Karen: Many years ago, my parents gave me a diary for my 12th birthday. I filled that little book with all the typical adolescent girl…
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The Music of Us
It never fails. You’re listening to the radio in the car and a song comes on. And it’s THAT song and you can’t help but sing along. The words speak to you, the tune grabs you, and you feel the song all the way down to the depths of your soul.
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Big Challenges, Big Rewards
John How often do you as husband and wife take on challenging tasks together? What has been your experience when you do? Julie and I recently took on organizing a regional Worldwide Marriage Encounter convention for over three hundred people in a city a couple of hours away. We knew going in that this was going to be stressful, tiring, complicated, and a big challenge, especially as it would be bilingual (which we are not) and include a Children’s Program. It would push our limits of confidence and abilities as individuals and as a couple. We also believed that it could be an opportunity for big rewards – to grow…
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Have a Safe and Happy Labor Day!
From our Couples Post family to yours, we wish you a safe and happy Labor Day celebrating with friends and family!
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The Drift
Exciting Beginnings We all battle something called “the drift” in marriage. Before we get into that, let’s begin with a happy story. We just attended a wedding. It was so much fun celebrating with the newlywed couple. At the reception, one of the groomsmen spoke about how he noticed a change in his friend (the groom) after the bride and groom met. All of a sudden, this young man was asking for time off from work so he could spend time with the beautiful young woman in his life. He just couldn’t wait to spend time with her. New love is quite a phenomenon, isn’t it? There really are no…
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The Shoe is on the Other Foot
The Shoe is on the Other Foot is a ‘fitting’ idiom for our lives and has challenged us to change our perspective. Tom has been nursing an arthritic right ankle, slowing our pace and impacting our lifestyle. I recently fell and broke my left foot and needed a little ‘nursing’ myself. I have not been a very patient patient. At our best, we have joked about tying our bum legs together and crossing the finish line in O-limpic fashion.
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The Rituals of Connection
Wikipedia defines rituals as a sequence of activities involving gestures, words, actions or objects of importance. It goes on to say that rituals forge bonds and help people turn towards one another because they are deeply rooted in a sense of predictability which lowers fear, provides comfort and can lower stress. The Counseling & Wellness Center of Pittsburgh defines a ritual of connection as specific times of interaction both informal and formal, that help couples come together, build intimacy, deepen their connection and create shared meaning in their relationship. They go on to say that these rituals are important in creating a healthy sense of anticipation, expectation and oneness in the relationship. Michelle…
