The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • football Game plan board with hearts and os
    Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Making Decisions,  Romance,  Sex

    The Game of Life

    July 12, 2021 / No Comments

    In the game of life, even with the best laid plans, things going awry isn’t just a possibility – it’s a probability.  It’s how we change the game plan that determines whether we turn it into a touchdown or a turnover.  Here’s the play-by-play of our recent weekend watching our twin 8-year-old nieces: Game plan: Camping in the back yard, complete with campfire and s’mores Actual play: 3 days straight of rain Punt: Making popcorn and watching a movie together Game plan: Going for a big explore in a nearby park and checking out the new playground equipment Actual play: 3 days straight of rain Punt: Crafts and having a…

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    John and Julie

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    Do You Remember the Last Fight You Had?

    June 16, 2024

    We’re Not Perfect and That’s Normal

    May 18, 2020
    patience

    Patience, Patience, Patience!

    October 21, 2024
  • Positive advice on a napkin
    Communication,  Parenting,  Passion,  Sex

    Sex — Naughty or Nice?

    June 27, 2021 / 2 Comments

    Sexual Expression is Everywhere Think: TV, Billboards and Music videos. So, why do we struggle to express our sexuality until the kids are asleep, and the bedrooms shades drawn? Answer: Perhaps, we were taught sex was taboo. This is sexual sabotage, likely unintentional. But unless we rid ourselves of these ghosts from the past, we will pass them on to our children.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    5 Reasons You Need a Getaway Without Kids

    January 8, 2024

    What Happened to Our Passion?

    April 1, 2019

    Reaching Out – Together

    April 20, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Romance,  Sex

    Taking the Easy Road

    June 7, 2021 / No Comments

    Marriage is hard work. Sometimes we make it harder than it needs to be. That’s why this week, we’re going to suggest a way to take the easy road.

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    Nick and Jen

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    Kudos To The Tired Dad

    March 24, 2025

    We Are More Than a Single Story

    December 12, 2022

    Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice

    January 9, 2021
  • Newly married couple holding hands tidbit of advice for married couples
    Children,  Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Forgiveness,  Making Decisions,  Passion,  Romance,  Sex

    30 for 30! A Tidbit of Advice for Each Year of Marriage

    May 31, 2021 / No Comments

      With June just around the corner, it’s time once again for wedding season to begin.  Whether you’re just starting your marriage journey or you’ve been on it for decades, couples can always use a piece of great advice – that’s why you’re reading this, right?  In honor of our 30th wedding anniversary, we thought we’d pass along 30 for 30 – one tidbit of advice we’ve discovered for each year of marriage: 

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    John and Julie

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    I Married YOU, Not Your Family

    February 24, 2020

    Tis the Season to Ruin Holidays

    November 11, 2024

    Rule #1 for Resolving Conflict

    November 15, 2020
  • Communication,  Sex,  Stress

    Laughter & Sex… That’s What She Said

    May 10, 2021 / No Comments

    Laughter can make hardship more tolerable like the glue that holds a marriage together when everything else is falling apart.  Laughter is also a lot like sex.  Both are pleasurable, shed calories, build immunity, reduce stress and put a smile on your face all day.  Seriously!

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Peeling the Onion of Intimacy in Marriage

    February 21, 2022

    Pushing Buttons

    September 21, 2020

    The Elephant in the Living Room

    June 29, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Sex,  Time

    5 Things Men Want

    March 1, 2021 / No Comments

    1. RESPECT: (KEN): When a man is asked, ‘Would you rather be respected or loved?’ most would choose being respected.  In his book Love and Respect, Dr. E. Eggerichs explains this tendency. (JANINE): For years, I didn’t appreciate how important it was to Ken that I treat him with respect.  I also didn’t understand how hurtful it was when I disrespected him.  When I show Ken respect (by affirming his decisions, avoiding sarcasm or by not using a demeaning tone) it translates (for him) into feeling ‘loved.’  Another way to say this is: when a man is disrespected, he receives the message he is NOT loved. 2. SEX: 

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    Ken and Janine

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    Peeling the Onion of Intimacy in Marriage

    February 21, 2022

    Just Go To Bed

    March 11, 2024

    Party Pitfalls

    November 28, 2018
  • Communication,  Sex

    Sex: Spontaneous or Planned . . . Let the Conversation Begin

    January 4, 2021 / No Comments

    Happy New Year to all!  We are so grateful that 2020 is clearly in our rear-view mirror.  What a relief.  The start of a new year is traditionally set aside for reflection and resolutions.  For us, 2021 was no different. We often make couple as well as individual resolutions.  Stress and busyness, age and life in general had cooled our sexual relationship to a slow simmer.  Our 2021 goal is :  “Some is good.  More is better!”  Planned or spontaneous — all is good! Let the conversation begin.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Love’s Sweet Spot

    March 9, 2020
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    The BEST of Your Life

    May 4, 2026

    A Love That Surprises and Remembers

    February 10, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Passion,  Romance,  Sex,  Time

    10 Things Women Want

    December 7, 2020 / No Comments

    1) Learn her “Love Language:” And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? ) Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank’ – her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us.  I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.

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    Ken and Janine

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    June 9, 2025
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    Trash Talk

    June 20, 2021

    It’s Not About the Dress

    July 6, 2018
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Differences,  Romance,  Sex

    8 Misunderstandings That Are Hurting Your Sex Life

    July 19, 2020 / No Comments

    Why are we writing about sex again?  Sex in marriage is more important than most people think.  It’s mysterious. There are a lot of “layers” and complexities to this whole topic…. read on…

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    Ken and Janine

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    I Will ROMANCE You Every Day of My Life

    July 25, 2018

    Changing Our Dance and Learning to Love It

    July 6, 2020

    Ready for a Marriage Check-up?

    February 16, 2026
  • Communication,  Differences,  Romance,  Sex

    Sex-pectations

    June 15, 2020 / No Comments

    “Expectation is the root of all heartache.”  – William Shakespeare We all enter marriage with “sex-pectations” – our ideas of what our sex life will be like.  When “we can’t get enough of each other” gradually deteriorates to “not tonight,” we find ourselves feeling disappointed, hurt, even un-loved. BUT…it doesn’t have to stay that way. 

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    Ken and Janine

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    Just Go To Bed

    March 11, 2024

    Walking Down Memory Lane

    November 7, 2021

    Marriage is a VERB

    March 11, 2019
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