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Sex — Naughty or Nice?
Sexual Expression is Everywhere Think: TV, Billboards and Music videos. So, why do we struggle to express our sexuality until the kids are asleep, and the bedrooms shades drawn? Answer: Perhaps, we were taught sex was taboo. This is sexual sabotage, likely unintentional. But unless we rid ourselves of these ghosts from the past, we will pass them on to our children.
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Laughter & Sex… That’s What She Said
Laughter can make hardship more tolerable like the glue that holds a marriage together when everything else is falling apart. Laughter is also a lot like sex. Both are pleasurable, shed calories, build immunity, reduce stress and put a smile on your face all day. Seriously!
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3 Steps to End the Bickering
Even the best marriages succumb to nit-picking over how to do the laundry or load the dishwasher. We differ over asking or not asking for directions and bicker over who’s to blame for being late or how we spend money. While these quarrels may seem trivial, in reality, they matter and getting to a solution beats bickering any day.
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The 5 “P’s” of Constructive Feedback
Photo Credit: Ian Schneider (Reprise of post originally published on 09-16-2019) We once read an article on criticism in marriage. The Author’s bottom line was “don’t do it.” Even asking: “Can I give you some feedback?” was cautioned against. Sometimes suggestions given with the best intent with regard to work, chores, relationships with the kids can back fire. Think back seat driving. Experience has taught us 5 Key Points for when we just want to give each other a little suggestion. These 5 simple points set the tone and enable us to let down our defenses and be supportive of each other when offering a little constructive feedback.
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When All Else Fails . . . Eat Ice Cream
For many of us the COVID honeymoon is long over. Isolation, loss of routines, access to the gym, financial worries, working from home and changing school schedules has had us stretched too thin too long. We’d rather eat an entire loaf of bread than bake one and if we hear how much someone enjoys the extra time with their kids we’ll scream! This is COVID Stress. We’ve all experienced it.
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Sex: Spontaneous or Planned . . . Let the Conversation Begin
Happy New Year to all! We are so grateful that 2020 is clearly in our rear-view mirror. What a relief. The start of a new year is traditionally set aside for reflection and resolutions. For us, 2021 was no different. We often make couple as well as individual resolutions. Stress and busyness, age and life in general had cooled our sexual relationship to a slow simmer. Our 2021 goal is : “Some is good. More is better!” Planned or spontaneous — all is good! Let the conversation begin.
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Radical non-Parenting
One of the hardest challenges of staying in relationship with married children is to cease parenting and to simply be a parent. When children marry we do not simply welcome a new member into the family. The marriage of a child radically changes family dynamics and relationships. Tying the knot in marriage is as profound as cutting the cord at birth.
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Finding Solid Ground — 7 Steps
Fall ushers in beautiful color, long shadows and cooler weather. Parents and kids thrive with the routine of school. This fall is anything but typical as we grow even more weary of the pandemic. We worry about finances and fret as to whether to send kids to school or stay virtual. With wildfires and hurricanes of epic proportion and a looming election, it seems the social fabric of our country is being ripped to shreds. In these stressful times, how do we find solid ground? Photo Credit: Nik Shuliahin
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“Zing-Zing-Zing!”
Google “conversation basics” and 4 of 5 bullets focus on listening. Listening is a vital part of conversation, but Great conversation is a balance of both speaking and listening. Photo Credit: Wynand vanPoortvliet MF: When we were dating, Tom’s ability to talk about anything and everything was very attractive. He is a fabulous storyteller, but sometimes I can’t help but interrupt a long story with an entry line like “Zing-zing-zing!” and then proceed to share a point or clarification.
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Changing Our Dance and Learning to Love It
Photo Credit: John Gibbons on Unsplash Most of us know someone who thrives on change. They love to spice things up. For them, the most maddening phrase is: “but we’ve always done it this way.” The rest of us find security in knowing what we know, doing what we do well and living within our comfort zone. We recently found ourselves at a crossroads in our lives with our medical practice. The writing on the wall said: “Don’t expect to see a change if you aren’t willing to make one.”
