The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

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  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

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  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • Communication,  Forgiveness

    Our Ketchup Story

    September 2, 2019 / No Comments

    Janine:  I used to read into everything Ken said – well almost everything.  If he made a simple comment, I often took it as a personal criticism, even though he didn’t intend it to be.  We still talk about the day, years ago, when he said, “Gee, we’re almost out of ketchup.”

    Read More
    Ken and Janine

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    We Are In Our Netflix Era

    July 27, 2026
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    The BEST of Your Life

    May 4, 2026

    Supporting Your Spouse While Maintaining Individuality

    October 4, 2020
  • Children,  Communication,  Parenting,  Time

    3 Tips to Make Your Marriage Thrive

    August 20, 2019 / No Comments

    Photo Credit:  Estee Janssens We hope this summer found you thriving, with plenty of time in the sun to relax and catch up with family and friends.  As these carefree days come to an end, we have some tips to help you continue to thrive. Fall gets busy —

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Keeping Up with the Jones’s

    August 26, 2019

    Tell Her She’s Pretty and Let Him Go Golfing

    January 18, 2021
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    The Drift 

    August 26, 2024
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Time

    Taking Your Marriage on Vacation

    July 29, 2019 / 1 Comment

    Photo by Wilson Sánchez Nine years into marriage, we were planning to leave town to visit family after Mark worked a half day. Mel packed up the kids and the car, and Mark just needed to throw in his suitcase. Mark was delayed several hours at work. By the time we met up, we were both irritated and highly stressed and just

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    Mark and Mel

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    Forgiveness & Healing

    August 13, 2018

    Advice From a Divorce Lawyer

    March 4, 2019

    Not All Habits Are Bad

    April 10, 2022
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love

    Anger, Over the Top

    July 15, 2019 / 1 Comment

    Photo Credit: Birgit Lengert We all know anger when we see it  — a clenched fist, a raised voice, a sullen look.  Anger can quickly surface and is readily expressed, but often it is a cover up for underlying feelings: 

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    3 Life Lessons From the Movie ‘Wicked’

    December 9, 2024
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    Time-out!

    January 19, 2026

    Scorekeeping in Marriage

    December 8, 2019
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love,  Relatives

    Words – The Seeds of Life in Marriage

    July 1, 2019 / No Comments

    Paul: Until recently, I figured it was fine for me to say whatever was on my mind as that meant I was being truthful and authentic with Stephanie. Then it dawned on me that some of those words are hurtful and have the potential to wound her.

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    Paul and Stephanie

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    Changing Our Dance and Learning to Love It

    July 6, 2020

    Knowing and Loving

    September 22, 2024

    A Love That Surprises and Remembers

    February 10, 2020
  • Communication,  Conflict

    Phones at the Dinner Table

    June 24, 2019 / 3 Comments

    While out to dinner recently we had a misunderstanding near the end of the meal.  I (Mel) was looking up information on my phone and showing it to Mark.  He was clearly disinterested, and I felt puzzled.

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    Mark and Mel

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    F.I.N.E.

    September 6, 2021

    Marriage is a VERB

    March 11, 2019

    Party Pitfalls

    November 28, 2018
  • Communication

    Marriage Manners Matter

    June 17, 2019 / 5 Comments

    Photo Credit: Thought Catalog “Fine!” and “Whatever!”  These 2 powerful words have the incredible potential to bring nearly any discussion to a screeching halt.  They send the insensitive message of “I don’t care. Discussion over.  Period. Full stop!”   As married couples, we have probably used these or similar words.  And, if we have raised children we have probably employed time out, taken the car keys or other forms of discipline. Those 2 little words are not  the focus of this blog.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Sex — Naughty or Nice?

    June 27, 2021

    Go Anywhere, Do Anything

    June 9, 2025

    The Empty Nest Repopulated – 4 Ways to make it Great!

    October 26, 2020
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Decision to Love

    Tidying Up Your Marriage KonMari Style

    June 10, 2019 / No Comments

    Photo Credit: Jimmy Ofisia MF:  One rainy spring weekend we came to a new insight about clutter and our marriage  as we set out to deep clean some closets and cabinets.  “A good weekend to KonMari,” I told Tom.  To which he replied “Kon-what?”  “Time to tidy-up and de-clutter.  Bring on the Joy!”

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    March 7, 2022
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    April 15, 2024

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    August 3, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Finances,  Forgiveness,  Sex

    The 7 Best Things We’ve Done for Our Marriage

    June 3, 2019 / No Comments

    Here’s our ‘Short List’ of the things that have had the biggest impact on our marriage. 1. The 5 Love Languages – In this book, Dr Gary Chapman explains there are 5 basic love languages and we each have a primary “language.”  We might be knocking ourselves out trying to show our spouse we love them,

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    Ken and Janine

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    Marriage Is a Teeter-Totter Ride

    July 18, 2022

    Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

    August 13, 2023

    What is Love Asking of Me Now?

    May 6, 2024
  • Communication,  Conflict,  Forgiveness

    Hurtful Attitudes in Marriage

    May 28, 2019 / No Comments

    Last weekend we stumbled across something that made us stop and re-evaluate our attitude. Sometimes our attitude comes across as a superiority – like when we believe we possess qualities or traits that our spouse doesn’t and become condescending – and this hurts our relationship. By “qualities” and “traits” we mean things such as: generosity, patience, understanding, compassion. Perhaps a couple of examples would help.

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    Paul and Stephanie

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    Marriage: Our Security in the Chaos

    April 5, 2020

    Tip of the Iceberg

    October 2, 2023

    Tell Her She’s Pretty and Let Him Go Golfing

    January 18, 2021
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