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4 Ways to Keep the Sexual Pilot Light Lit
Julie – It finally happened. After two years of extreme caution, COVID finally found us. First John, then me. John? Like a bad cold that lingered. Me? Pretty much the sickest I’ve ever been in my life and still battling fatigue a month later. We didn’t kiss each other for a couple of weeks, much less think about making love. Heck, my sleeping was so erratic and restless that we didn’t even sleep in the same bed for weeks. Physical or mental illness, childbirth, surgery, kids who constantly want to sleep with mommy and daddy, changing hormones, or the death of a close family member can wreak havoc on the sexual…
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Little Things
JULIE “Little Things Mean a Lot” was one of my mom’s favorite songs. It starts off like this: “Blow me a kiss from across the roomSay I look nice when I’m notTouch my hair as you pass my chairLittle things mean a lot” These timeless lyrics are spot on – little things DO mean a lot. I do many little things for John throughout the day. I can make John’s coffee. I can scratch his head. I can make his favorite meal for dinner. I can put my phone down and listen when he tells me about his day. All of these are little things that when done with great…
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Our Wedding Vows, Revisited
“One thing I am sure of is that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?” JULIE We were recently privileged to hear these words spoken by our son, and to witness the teary, smiley, enthusiastic YES that was his now-fiancée’s response. OUR SON IS GETTING MARRIED! WE ARE GETTING A NEW DAUGHTER! Our daughter-in-law-to-be wasn’t the only one who was crying. That moment will forever rank as one of the most beautiful, emotional, joy-filled, and exciting moments we’ve ever experienced.
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Love Letters
Julie I recently rediscovered a box of love letters that my parents wrote to each other. My dad had given them to me after my mom died. My dad was drafted into the army when he and my mom were still newlyweds. There was no email, no texting, no Facetime. There was only a brief Sunday phone call and love letters Monday through Saturday. These letters were mostly about details of daily life, but they were also filled with expressions of love and longing to be together again. Their arrival was a daily reminder of their love and the commitment they had made to each other.
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In Sickness and In Health
Julie: I’m sick. And tired. And sick and tired of being sick and tired AGAIN. I’m basically allergic to life, which causes frequent infections and debilitating migraine headaches. John knew all this when he married me, and he cheerfully vowed to love me “in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.” I’m pretty sure he had no idea what he was getting himself into.
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Recreating Your Relationship
JOHN: We just returned from two separate camping trips about a week apart. The first was the annual family camping trip with our young adult kids in the tent with us and 17 members of the extended family on nearby sites. The second was just the two of us. Wow, what a difference! While we love spending 24/7 time with our kids and extended family, we also love the calm and freedom that come with camping as a couple. It reminds us fondly of our early years together.
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The Game of Life
In the game of life, even with the best laid plans, things going awry isn’t just a possibility – it’s a probability. It’s how we change the game plan that determines whether we turn it into a touchdown or a turnover. Here’s the play-by-play of our recent weekend watching our twin 8-year-old nieces: Game plan: Camping in the back yard, complete with campfire and s’mores Actual play: 3 days straight of rain Punt: Making popcorn and watching a movie together Game plan: Going for a big explore in a nearby park and checking out the new playground equipment Actual play: 3 days straight of rain Punt: Crafts and having a…
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Children, Communication, Conflict, Decision to Love, Forgiveness, Making Decisions, Passion, Romance, Sex
30 for 30! A Tidbit of Advice for Each Year of Marriage
With June just around the corner, it’s time once again for wedding season to begin. Whether you’re just starting your marriage journey or you’ve been on it for decades, couples can always use a piece of great advice – that’s why you’re reading this, right? In honor of our 30th wedding anniversary, we thought we’d pass along 30 for 30 – one tidbit of advice we’ve discovered for each year of marriage:
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KFC – It’s What’s for Mother’s Day!
JULIE: Dandelion bouquets. Homemade breakfast in bed. Handmade cards splashed with crayon hearts. Kentucky Fried Chicken. Wait, what? Let me explain…
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The Super-Power of Affirmation
JULIE: I’m not a superhero. While I can’t fly faster than a speeding bullet, make myself invisible, or read people’s minds, I CAN harness the super-power of affirmation by telling John the numerous reasons he is special to me or the many traits I admire in him. Never underestimate the super-power of affirmation to build up your spouse and enhance your relationship.