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Choose Your Hard
“Marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. Choose your hard. Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard. Being in debt is hard. Being financially disciplined is hard. Choose your hard. Communication is hard. Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard. Life will never be easy. It will always be hard. But we can choose our hard. Choose wisely.” – Unknown Marriage Enrichment? Really? Is your marriage one of the most important gifts you have? If a friend told you, “My wife and I went to a marriage class,” would you say, ‘Oh no. Are you two having trouble?’ Or, would you say ‘How was it? We’ve been wanting to do something like…
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Making Up is Hard to Do
If you’re married, you’ve experienced conflict with your spouse. It’s inevitable in any relationship. Usually, this happens unintentionally – often over the littlest things. Most conflicts are a result of unmet expectations: I expected “this”, but “that” happened. One, or both of us, ends up feeling disrespected or hurt. Tensions Are Triggers Janine: Years ago, we were expecting company, and I was scurrying around tidying up. Ken asked what he could do to help so I asked him to put away the clean dishes. I then continued dashing around in panic mode because, after all, if the house is a mess our friends might think less of us (especially ME.) 😨 A few minutes went…
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Marriage Is a Teeter-Totter Ride
If you’ve spent time on a playground before 2004, you’ve probably hopped on a teeter-totter. Marriage is a teeter-totter ride. It can be relaxing, a gentle give and take. Marriage, like a teeter-totter can also be an experience of thrilling highs and the dizzying feeling of dropping low.
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My Tip Troll
Chris: Let me begin by saying, I know that my wife is smart, creative and talented. When I tell you the rest of the story, rest assured, it is not because I do not know this. Michelle came to me one afternoon with this phrase, “Hey Babe, I need your advice.” My Tip Troll was delighted. She started to tell me what was going on and I stopped listening about a third of the way in because, quite frankly, my Tip Troll knew exactly what advice to offer. When she finally finished, I was able to share my wisdom. But, to my Troll’s dismay, Michelle shook her head and walked out of the room. Leaving my Troll’s…
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Help Us Make The Couples Post Better
We’re celebrating 4 years of weekly posts at The Couples Post! Since May 2018, The Couples Post has been posting articles on marriage – sharing experiences and advice for married couples. It’s time for us to find out what you think. Whether you’ve been following us since the beginning, or you just stumbled upon our site recently, we hope you will take 2-3 minutes to send us your feedback. Here’s a link to a 3 minute survey We value your time AND your opinion. Thank you for sharing them both with us.
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Table Talk
Michelle: For months, I had been telling Chris that the wobbly table needed to be fixed. Each evening, I would come home to find it still wobbled. How could this be? My husband is a carpenter. In my mind, I began to create a story. Chris wants to see how many times I’m going to bring it up. He is just trying to make me mad. Maybe, he doesn’t want to fix the table. I could go on and on with the stories I had…because remember, the table was wobbly for MONTHS. Finally, I made a decision. I was not going to bring the table up again, I just stopped commenting on the table. One morning, we sat down for…
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Candid Chris
Michelle: When I was teaching third grade, one of the assignments I gave my students was to create and write about their own superhero. One of my students, wrote about Buttered Toast Man. A three-pager about a guy whose job it was to save the world from dry toast. What my students didn’t know is that I live with my very own superhero, my husband, Candid Chris. His superpower: tell people hard-hitting truths that they might not want to hear and probably want to acknowledge even less. If I were writing his superhero story, I would include the time that Candid Chris said to our neighbor, “Sure your new car is great, but it…
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What is the Secret to a Happy Marriage?
Most people don’t start out in marriage thinking “This could be fun for a while, but once it’s not I’ll move on.” When you get married it’s exciting and romantic and fun and interesting. But no marriage is free from challenges and disagreements. There is no magic finish line where there are no challenges in our marriage. The temptation to think such a place exists is one of the biggest dangers of all, because it sets you up for failure.
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In Sickness and In Health
Julie: I’m sick. And tired. And sick and tired of being sick and tired AGAIN. I’m basically allergic to life, which causes frequent infections and debilitating migraine headaches. John knew all this when he married me, and he cheerfully vowed to love me “in sickness and in health as long as we both shall live.” I’m pretty sure he had no idea what he was getting himself into.
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Us Against the World
Marriage is not a 50 / 50 proposition. The weight of responsibility in marriage will vary unevenly between husband and wife from day to day. But what do we do when the load is not balanced for a long time or when we both don’t have much left to give each other?
