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Fair is Not Necessarily Equal
A classic line out of any child’s mouth is “It’s not fair!” Children use this line to cover everything from chores to birthday parties to bedtimes. It’s a comparison game, but in the end, fair isn’t necessarily equal.
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Married Couples: Are We Too Busy?
We often find our identity in what we accomplish. Our activities and responsibilities can build up until we are crushed beneath them. Are we so busy that we miss out on beauty, relationship, and belonging? Have we become ‘human doings’ rather than ‘human beings.’ It’s hard to grow our marriage if we’re too busy to BE with each other. Busy Families JANINE: If you grew up on a farm like I did, you might remember the ‘breakneck’ pace of harvest or planting time. During those busy days, both Dad and Mom were working intense hours and running on little sleep. This extraordinary pace was for the short-term and my parents knew…
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Sex — Naughty or Nice?
Sexual Expression is Everywhere Think: TV, Billboards and Music videos. So, why do we struggle to express our sexuality until the kids are asleep, and the bedrooms shades drawn? Answer: Perhaps, we were taught sex was taboo. This is sexual sabotage, likely unintentional. But unless we rid ourselves of these ghosts from the past, we will pass them on to our children.
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KFC – It’s What’s for Mother’s Day!
JULIE: Dandelion bouquets. Homemade breakfast in bed. Handmade cards splashed with crayon hearts. Kentucky Fried Chicken. Wait, what? Let me explain…
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Happy Holidays? In 2020? Yes!
“It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” ― Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Whether our holiday family traditions have been around for generations or started in our own marriage, one thing is for certain – 2020 has upended them all.
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Rule #1 for Resolving Conflict
Paul: With our child rearing days behind us, I figured any potential conflict surrounding child rearing was over too. Boy was I mistaken. We took our 3 year old granddaughter with us to the beach for two weeks so she wouldn’t have to be in day care. While we were both looking forward to some quality time with her, I cringed when Stephanie suggested that we run point on potty training her. That’s when the trouble began. My attitude was, “Why do we have do this?” But instead of speaking up, I kept silent.
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Radical non-Parenting
One of the hardest challenges of staying in relationship with married children is to cease parenting and to simply be a parent. When children marry we do not simply welcome a new member into the family. The marriage of a child radically changes family dynamics and relationships. Tying the knot in marriage is as profound as cutting the cord at birth.
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The Empty Nest Repopulated – 4 Ways to make it Great!
Julie: When our kids were small, it was easy to keep peace in the nest. Mama and Daddy bird had the final say and that was it. Ah, little kids, little problems. Things got a little trickier as those baby birds grew into fledglings. As our kids grew and stretched their wings, they asserted their increasing independence and often challenged our rules and decisions. As young adults who have left the nest, they are more respectful when they return home, but things can still get a little tense as we are still their parents and they are still our kids.
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Can We Have Some Pickles with That Sandwich?
JULIE: It is 7 a.m. and I’m awake before the alarm, mind racing as I go over the mental checklist of what needs to be done today. John is out cold. He is exhausted from the physical and mental demands of the past week of caring for his parents while helping them sort through and pack up a lifetime’s worth of belongings. Now it is moving day, the day they will start their final chapter together in assisted living. The melancholy in the air is stifling.
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Parenting as a Team
Photo by John Mark-Smith Becoming parents is such an amazing blessing. From the moment we first hold our newborn child, our world is changed. Whether navigating the terrible two’s or adjusting to parenting young adults, we learned something that is crucial about parenting – we are much stronger together than we are as individuals.
