The Couples Post

Support for married couples, by married couples.

  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • Date Night Ideas
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover

Pages

  • 20 Ways to Become a More Patient Spouse this Week
  • 25 Conversation Starter Questions on Sexuality
  • 50 Questions to ask your spouse besides “How was your day?”
  • 50 Ways to Engage Kids on a Budget
  • 50 Ways to Love Your Lover
  • About
  • At Home Dating
  • BAILEY’S TREE
  • Barriers to Forgiveness and Healing
  • Confronting for the Sake of Our Relationship
  • Conversation Starters
  • Date Night Ideas
  • Dialogue
  • Double Chocolate Brownies
  • Emotional Bank Account
  • Feelings Reflect Who I am as a Unique Individual
  • Four Basic Psychological Needs
  • How to Foster Teamwork – A Starter List
  • In Memory of Fr. Tom Ogg
  • Let’s Talk about Sex
  • Making Decisions as a Couple – 10 Steps
  • Marriage Check-up Exercise
  • Our Family Commandments
  • Phones at the Dinner Table Discussion Questions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Re-Evaluation
  • Stress vs. Burnout and Depression
  • The Power of Positive: Examples of Converting Negatives about our Relationship to Positives
  • There’s Always Something More to Talk About
  • Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience
  • Writing a Focused Love Letter
  • Decision to Love,  Romance,  Sex

    The Secret Recipe of Intimacy

    February 11, 2019 / No Comments

    Photo Credit: Soroush Karimi In our last post we hinted at the complexity of intimacy, especially in the context of forgiveness and healing (1/13/19).  Intimacy involves more than sex.  In fact sex can sometimes be anything but intimate. Many authors and psychologists speak of at least 4 components to deep and sustained intimacy.  They often include emotional, intellectual, spiritual and physical intimacy.  We like to think of this as the ‘Secret Recipe.’ To achieve this Intimacy we both need to desire and be willing to work towards intimacy.

    Read More
    Tom and Mary Frances

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    Keeping Your Marriage Sane While Quarantined

    March 30, 2020
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    In Sickness and In Health

    September 20, 2021

    What Happened to Our Passion?

    April 1, 2019
  • Communication,  Romance,  Sex

    Play’s The Thing!

    January 26, 2019 / No Comments

    Paul: Anyone who knows us, knows that we’re not going to go down in history for our sense of spontaneity and silliness. We’re serious people. But some years ago good friends of ours encouraged us to take a break from the consistent seriousness and make time for play. They said playfulness in our marriage can help us keep some perspective when the trials of daily life get us down.

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    Paul and Stephanie

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    Trash Talk

    June 20, 2021

    Annual Marriage Tune-Up

    August 23, 2020

    Verbal Judo – Harmonizing Your Tone of Voice

    September 14, 2025
  • Romance,  Time

    Date Nights

    September 17, 2018 / No Comments

    In July we wrote a post on Romance, simple and spontaneous.  We described it as a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love and remoteness from every day life and promised a post on dating.  One of our favorite quotes from Mignon McLaughlin, author and journalist is: “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”  This is why “Date Nights” are so important. They take us back to why we fell in love all over again.  Everyday “Romance” makes us crave those “Date Nights.”  We have found both to be important in our 38 plus years of marriage.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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    December 7, 2020
  • Communication,  Romance,  Sex

    What is Sexy?

    September 6, 2018 / 2 Comments

    We have been married for over 24 years and our attraction to each other is as strong as ever.  So, we asked ourselves what has been our secret to lasting passion in our marriage?  Sex appeal can be very subjective.  What is sexy to one is  not to another.  How do we navigate these preferences within our marriage?  What can we do to make sure our marital sexual relationship is filled with blazing passion that lasts?  If you are on the edge of your seat waiting for the answer, you are in for a treat.

    Read More
    Mark and Mel

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  • Decision to Love,  Romance,  Sex

    Great Sex!

    August 6, 2018 / 1 Comment

    Photo by ijeab / Freepik Sex between a married couple is not only good, it’s very good. If you read the research and surveys, you will find that married couples experience better and more frequent sex than non-married couples. Married couples are healthier, happier, and live longer. When we went on a WorldWide Marriage Encounter weekend, we were more than a little surprised when a priest told us that our love-making is good, is important for us, and is important to the world. He encouraged us to “make mad passionate love!”

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    Ken and Janine

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    September 14, 2025
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    Us Against the World

    August 22, 2021

    Annual Marriage Tune-Up

    August 23, 2020
  • Finances,  Romance

    What Makes a Good Gift?

    July 30, 2018 / 1 Comment

    Our youngest child graduated from high school this spring, and our gift to him was a grad party.  Grad parties are a big deal where we live – white tents, catered food, a fancy cake, and a display of photos of the graduate growing up.  And, of course, that pretty box for guests to place their cards!

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    Mark and Mel

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    July 7, 2025
  • Communication,  Romance

    I Will ROMANCE You Every Day of My Life

    July 25, 2018 / No Comments

    Ahh, Romance!  You may be thinking wine, roses, candle light dinners and such.  Every day would get pretty expensive.  Let’s call that dating — more about that in another post.  Dating involves an invitation — that is half the fun. Romance is simple and spontaneous.

    Read More
    Tom and Mary Frances

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    November 7, 2021
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    August 3, 2020
  • Communication,  Decision to Love,  Romance

    It’s Not About the Dress

    July 6, 2018 / 2 Comments

    The wedding venue, the dress, the flowers, the photographer…when did all this get to be so important?  

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    Ken and Janine

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    October 14, 2019
  • Decision to Love,  Romance

    The Grass is Greener . . . Where You Water It

    May 15, 2018 / No Comments

    The Grass is Greener… I love the quote “The grass is greener where you water it.” It is especially appropriate this time of year when Wyoming is lush and green. I love the smell of lilacs and the wet earth as everything comes back to life after an incredibly long winter. It’s rhubarb and asparagus season and I can’t wait to see the green shoots pop their little heads above the soil. I enjoy looking over the fence to sneak a peek at the neighbor’s garden and kibbutz about garden plans. Tulips and daffodils are in full bloom and life couldn’t be better.

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    Tom and Mary Frances

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