The 7 Best Things We’ve Done for Our Marriage

Here’s our ‘Short List’ of the things that have had the biggest impact on our marriage.

1. The 5 Love Languages – In this book, Dr Gary Chapman explains there are 5 basic love languages and we each have a primary “language.”  We might be knocking ourselves out trying to show our spouse we love them, but it doesn’t necessarily translate into him/her feeling loved….IF we’re not speaking THEIR language.  When we read this short book together and learned to speak each other’s language, it was a game changer for us.  To learn more, read: What Language are you Speaking?

2. Get on the Same Page about Money – Finances can be a huge struggle for couples.  Consider this: “When you argue about money, you’re usually not arguing about money.”  We needed to figure out what feelings were under the surface of our disagreements on this subject – fear?  resentment?  insecurity? For help getting out of debt and building financial security, read “The Total Money Makeover” by Dave Ramsey. Also, read this post:  Money Matters.

3. Worldwide Marriage Encounter Weekend – The best thing we’ve done for our marriage. Making the time and finding babysitters was so worth it! This weekend away helped us focus on our marriage in a positive way. Topics covered included: personality styles, communication, listening, re-evaluation and a lot more. For over 50 years the WWME weekend has helped millions of couples around the world.

4. Put Your Marriage First – It can be easy to put our marriage on the back burner – thinking other things (job, children, fitness, etc) are more important.   Check out our post – We Come First – to read about how to keep your relationship a priority.  We decided that the best gift we can give our kids is parents who love each other.  Here’s something to ponder: “When you make kids the center of your universe, they turn into adults who think they are the center of the universe.” – Mel Robins.

Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash

5. Learn to Forgive and Ask for Forgiveness – In every marriage there are struggles and feelings are hurt.  Learning the art of forgiveness and healing isn’t easy.  We had to quit sweeping things under the rug.  Check out these posts: Forgiveness and Healing or Making up is Hard to Do for more insight on this.

6. Communicate about Your Sexual Relationship – It’s awkward to talk about our love making, but when we did, it was like a breath of fresh air for our whole relationship.  Reading Kevin Leman’s book, Sheet Music together helped us open the lines of communication in this touchy area (pun intended).  For more on this topic read: Great Sex or Sex on Days Ending in ‘Y’.

7. Surround Yourself with Others Who Value Marriage – Hanging around with other happily married couples has inspired us to keep striving for the best marriage we can have.

How about you … What’s the best thing you’ve done for your marriage?  We’d love to hear from you.  Leave us a comment below.