The Busy Train

Julie

All Aboard! We pile in the Busy Train and hang on for dear life, John in one car and me in another.  The scenery flies by, until it becomes a blur.  Distracted by responsibilities and commitments, we see each other only in passing.  We talk at meals, but not about much, and not for long – too much to do!  Cuddle time flies out the window as we work late into the night and then get up and do it all over again the next day. 

Stop the train!  I want to get off!

The good news is that WE CAN.  ANY TIME WE WANT.  Our choices put us on the Busy Train and our choices also allow us to get off.

John

When our kids were small, we delighted in every milestone, celebrating first steps, potty training, and the first day of preschool.  Life was simpler then – our focus was primarily on us and our growing family.  We were content to just spend time together as a family and then as a couple after the kids went to bed.

As our kids grew older, we were introduced to the Busy Train.  We thought that by keeping our kids busy, we could keep them out of trouble (by the way, that doesn’t always work).  Piano lessons, dance lessons, Cub Scouts, soccer, gymnastics, drama…each YES to an activity was a YES to another ride on the Busy Train. 

We attended a Worldwide Marriage Encounter Experience and learned the importance of keeping our relationship a priority.  How?  By choosing to spend time together.  By saying NO to busy-ness so we can say YES to us.

Getting on the Busy Train is still very tempting, but we now recognize when we’re on that train and make choices to get off at the very next station.

Julie

We took a ride on the Busy Train again over the holidays.  Between shopping, wrapping, making cookies, etc., we were going nonstop.  As my tiredness and crankiness increased, I could hear the clanging bells and warning signs of an imminent crash.  Then John pulled the emergency brake by suggesting lovemaking in the middle of the afternoon  Afterward we ate leftovers and didn’t do the dishes.  We let the laundry wait one more day.  We turned on the Christmas lights, lit the fire, and cuddled under a blanket on the couch, enjoying a long overdue evening of talking, laughing, and just spending time together.  And guess what?  The world kept right on spinning and didn’t fall off its axis. 

We enjoyed it so much that we did it again the next night!  We talked about our hopes and dreams for the coming year.  We fleshed out a few ideas for getting away together.  We snuggled and cuddled.  Most importantly, we recommitted to making decisions to keep us OFF the Busy Train.  We went to bed that night with our souls refreshed and our relationship back on track.

John

So, how about you?  Tired of riding the Busy Train?  Remember, the emergency brake is right there – you just need to make the choice to pull it and get off!