Chat GPT’s Advice about Forgiveness & Healing

KEN: Who else out there has been caught up in the Chat GPT craze? I thought it might be fun to see what Chat GPT has to say about Forgiveness and Healing in Marriage. Here’s what Chat GPT told me…

Chat GPT’s Conclusions about Forgiveness and Healing

“Forgiveness and healing are essential for any marriage that has experienced hurt or pain. By acknowledging the hurt, practicing empathy, letting go of resentment, being patient, and creating a plan for moving forward, couples can work together to rebuild their relationship and create a stronger, healthier bond. Remember, forgiveness is not always easy, but it is necessary for a happy and fulfilling marriage.”

We’ve taken the suggested steps from Chat GPT and inserted our own example – which took place In Real Life.

JANINE: Back in February, Ken and I had to make a decision about a four-month work assignment in San Francisco. I didn’t want to go. I’d been looking forward to just being ‘at home.’ I tried so many ways to tell Ken that I didn’t like this idea. Due to circumstances beyond our control, we ended up accepting this job assignment. I was frustrated and resentful, and I kept a chip on my shoulder about it.

Acknowledge the Hurt

Now that we’ve arrived in San Francisco, I recognize that I’ve been pouting and holding onto resentment – AND keeping an emotional distance from Ken. It hasn’t done me, or US, any good.

Practice Empathy

When I put myself in Ken’s shoes, I can relate to his feelings of obligation to his job. I’ve felt obligated about many things I’ve agreed to in the past (whether it was for my job, my parents, our kids, etc). As I recall how I’ve done some crazy things to ‘be a good employee and co-worker,’ I can understand Ken’s point of view.

Let Go of Resentment

For me, the most helpful step in the process was to recognize how I was holding onto resentment (or to acknowledge my feelings). Now that I understood what I was doing, I let go of that chip on my shoulder and quit pouting.

Be Patient

I first realized how upset I was about this job back in March. Yet here we are in late April, and I’m finally ready to let go and stop dwelling on this. It’s taken me a long time. As chat GPT says, forgiveness and healing take time, and it’s important to be patient with yourself and your spouse. Don’t expect everything to be resolved overnight, and don’t try to rush the process. Allow time for healing and rebuilding trust.

Create a Plan for Moving Forward

We sat down to talk through all this. I admitted that I’d been blaming Ken for a situation that wasn’t his fault. I told him I decided to quit blaming him and said, “I’m sorry for holding this against you. Will you please forgive me?”

KEN: Now aware of Janine’s perspective and feelings, my answer was an easy “Yes.”  It took us quite a few conversations to work through this situation, but the work was worth it. Together, we’ve decided to make a list of things to see and do while we’re here. After all, we only have 4 months to explore this city!