Positively Live

Chris:

I am a realist. I believe there are good and bad people. My wife is an optimist. She believes there are good people and good people who just make bad choices. Sometimes, her positivity causes me to worry, thinking that her naive outlook will get her hurt. Other times, her positivity is contagious. Here is how she tames my negativity and balances us out as a couple.

Michelle:

I think there are several easy ways to stay positive. I use the acronym LIVE every day and in every situation to remember to approach with positivity.

L is for LOVE.

Whether the situation is with Chris, a coworker or a random person at the grocery store, when I approach with a spirit of love I find that fear of not having what it takes to help dissipates.

Chris:

Recently, our daughter’s fiancé called me the morning of a big project delivery to tell me he would not be able to help. My instinct was to hang up on him and complain to Michelle about his lack of respect. But in a brief moment of grace, I said, “Oh, I hope everything is okay. Do you have different day because I was really counting on you to help?” The next morning as he and I were driving to the job site, he shared that he was so nervous to have to call and cancel and was so grateful for how I gave him and opportunity to make it up.

Michelle:

The I stands for INQUIRE.

If I just accept something just as it is, the world can look grim. But when I dig a little deeper with people, there are usually things below the surface that can support me reframing the situation.

Chris:

When a customer emailed a project design and color change halfway through, I shared with Michelle several expletives to describe where they could shove their project. When Michelle asked me why, I had to admit I had no idea. She suggested I call back and armed me with questions to seek clarity. I have to admit when I approached this customer with a spirit of love, I was able to understand their desires and even support an adjustment that did not include a complete overhaul of the project.

Michelle:

The V stands for VULNERABLE.

I have found that when I approach a situation with vulnerability rather than being the one with all the answers I have far more positive outcomes.

Chris:

I like to be right. No, I LIVE to be right. I will even find ways that I’m still right even when I’m wrong. When Michelle and I were driving somewhere I had never been, I suddenly got turned around. When Michelle said that she thought we were going the wrong way, I laughed and told her to relax and enjoy the ride. Soon, I realized I that while I was not wrong we were not in the correct location. While the vulnerability to ask Michelle to map the directions hurt, it reminded me that the right thing to do was seek her help.

Michelle

The E stands for ENERGY.

I like to check my energy at the door BEFORE I enter a situation. Positive energy is contagious but so is negative. When I check how I’m showing up before I show up, I am able to shift where I need to in order to bring my best self.

Chris:

Recently, when Michelle and I went on vacation, we arrived at the resort to find that the airline’s careless handling of my golf bag resulted in a broken driver. While I was incredibly upset about the broken driver, my immediate response was a little bit of panic because my “vacation schedule” was quickly going to change since morning golf was out of the question. My shift happened when I took in my surroundings and the amazing person I was with. While I can’t say I didn’t miss going golfing, I can say that I loved every moment of that vacation!